It could only happen to me

WV-VA-NC-GA-FL-AL-MS and more

2008-11-12T12:09:00.006-05:00

I haven't finished my account of my last trip and here I am heading out again.

Let's just say that Rhode Island was beautiful. Mainly what I saw in Connecticut was three casinos where I did quite well. We did spend some time at the Mystic Seaport. We didn't pay to enter buy roamed around.

I'm such a shutter-bug.

I was going to post over there about my upcoming travels but it seems someone broke it.

Leaving probably tomorrow to visit my brother in WV, my sister in NC, his parents in FL and his brother in MS. If we have any money and all is well at home we may drive to AZ to visit a friend of his and my aunt.

The trip to AZ would take us across TX and I know there are quite a few peeps in TX I'd like to meet.

On a sad note my cat is becoming more ill and I've made an appointment with the vet this afternoon before I leave. He may have to be put to sleep. I'm not sure I can handle that. He's gotten me through some tough times.

Bahston

2008-08-27T20:57:00.008-04:00

Finally, Boston. Before leaving Columbus I did mountains of research on Vermont, New Hampshire and Maine. I did no research on Massachusetts, Rhode Island and Connecticut. Well, I did some lighthouse research on these states, but that was all.

Luckily the hotel gave us our room early and we carted all our stuff to the room. When we checked in we asked for a map of Boston. We were given a booklet, a booklet that was useless. Shortly after Kim called. She was sightseeing and we tried to pinpoint a spot to meet. She kept saying that she was by Faneuil Hall. Well I still don't know how to pronounce that and with her accent I was lost. Finally we zeroed in on Quincy Market which I could find on my map. Next step was to find a stop for the rapid transit. The front desk, useless again, told us to walk to the bridge linking Cambridge to Boston and that there was a stop across the bridge. The bridge looked to us to be more than a mile up the road and pretty long. I deciphered the map in the booklet and found a stop. We put it into the GPS in the car, found it, parked walked to the stop. Funny story, I didn't know how to buy a ticket. Some kind passenger explained it to us and told us what stop to take. We're getting closer.

After we got off the stop we had no idea which way to walk and we disagreed on which way to start. By the time we found Quincy Market Kim had tired of waiting on us and needed some milk. I called her and after she coated her stomach with milk she came and found us. Shortly thereafter Ayak join us for a short tour of the area. He had to return to work to take some calls. I can't remember where we (Kim, Dbf and I) ate but we had a good meal and walked to the harbor. Kim was off to get a couple hours sleep before beginning her work for the Breast Cancer Walk.

The next day we had a bunch of touristy things to do including: Seeing the USS Constitution, Paul Revere's house, Bunker Hill, etc. We drove the car into town and had little problem parking or driving around.

The view of Boston from our hotel

room.

Next we're going to or through Rhode Island on the way to Dbf's favorite destination - a casino in Connecticut.

Maine is beautiful (and so is Tenorsaxy)

2008-08-24T20:43:00.006-04:00

We arrived in Maine in time to sleep. The next day we headed out for Bar Harbor. We got onto the Acadia National Park drive and, quite honestly we were so tired of trees, we got back off. We drove in and out the jagged coast line which took much longer than I thought it would. We had lunch in Bass Harbor at the cutest restored building. There was also a hotel and we hoped to get a room at the Inn but it was sold out. I had to get in the water in Maine. It was overcast that day and the water was approximately 58 degrees.

We made our way back up the peninsula to the next location on my list. I wasn't feeling all that well this day. I had plans to meet Tenorsaxy for dinner later. I was glad I honored that commitment because we had a great dinner in a great restaurant in Camden. Dbf took our picture with his camera. Somehow he lost all his pictures from that day. Lesson learned - use my camera for important pictures.

Tensorsaxy is so cute! And quite adventurous to move to such a "wild" state. And she gave me a scrumptious jar of Wild Blueberry Jam. Such a thoughtful gesture.

We found a delightfully perfect room in Lincolnville, ME. It's called the Black Horse Inn. I highly recommend it to anyone who is traveling the ME coast. It was so homey. We stayed there two nights which removed the possibility of staying in southern coastal Maine or coastal New Hampshire (which was my first thought).

The second day in Maine we chased lighthouses until dark. We visited the Rockland, Owls Head, Pemaquid Point, Marshall Point Lighthouses. Driving down to these points also took more time than I imagined. We made quite a hike over rocks, etc. to get good pictures.

Another thing about coastal Maine. Since we arrived in Vermont we were out of civilization, as we know it. Arriving in Rockland, Maine we had a McDonalds, WallMart, a Timmies, and my Dbf's favorite TJMaxx. I bought an outfit at TJ's which I wore in the pictures with Weltek.

Off to Boston to meet Weltek and Ayak.

New Hampshire - we hardly got to know you

2008-08-22T15:28:00.003-04:00

We left Vermont with the plan to rush to Mt. Washington before the rain came in. It was a beautiful day in Vermont. The closer we got to Mt. Washington the cloudier it was. As we were driving around the road we tried to guess if Mt. Washington was in the clouds or sun. When we first entered the gate it was partly sunny - yeah. As we drove the winding, narrow road and climbed higher it became cloudy. The road was originally built in the 1800's with little changes so it was very narrow. As we neared the top it actually hailed. We reached the top in a huge downpour. After a lung transplant for me (the steps to the facilities were steep and many), I looked in the gift shops and decided to have one of their famous hotdogs. As I finished eating I noticed the sun was out. We hurried out to climb and get pictures. It's true that the weather on Mt. Washington changes in seconds. It was partly sunny, raining, clouds on the ground and back again four or five times while we were up there. It is said you can see Maine and Vermont from up there. *sigh* this is what we saw. The rainbow was a plus.

Before we left Vermont, though, we found this wonderful old mill. And there was a craft type festival. I bought some Shaker boxes and a variety bread loaf that had Banana, Pumpkin, Blueberry, Pecan, and some others.

Next Maine and some sad news due to Dbf.

For Puffy

2008-08-20T20:31:00.007-04:00

We left Friday after my rehab appt., around 1:00. We drove and drove and drove and decided to get a room. We stayed in New York, right across from the southern Vermont border. The weather forecast was for rain (New England had been and was predicted to still get rain). We woke up to a clear, beautiful morning so we hit Route 9 to Bennington and planned to drive up Route 100 which is a twisty, scenic route (one of the ten most scenic routes in the US) from southern to northern Vermont. We had lunch in Bennington at a cute local place and took some pictures with the street art.

My plans to travel Route 100 were ruined by rain. We decided to detour and see some covered bridges. Vermont has approximately 90 covered bridges still in use. Rivers in Vermont are not like the rivers in Ohio. Here they are so slow they are almost stagnant. I've never experience rivers that flow so fast. They were cold also. We climbed down river banks, over rocks in a contest to get the best pictures. The weather varied from overcast to light showers to occasional sun.

Exhausted and happy that the day wasn't a total wash out we found our hotel.

Saturday we traveled around the Lake Champlain area, visited Montpelier where they have artwork made from old bicycle parts around the city, chased more covered bridges:

and went to Vermont's famous:

It was sunny and beautiful!!!!

Next out short New Hampshire time.

I'm baaaaaaacck

2008-08-19T13:02:00.001-04:00

Six states in nine days - three new peeps met with two missed - one small argument - one big argument which almost caused me to fly home - six covered bridges - five lighthouses - three casinos - six hotels - cold weather - cool weather - hot weather - sunny skies - cloudy skies - rain - standing in clouds - one unexpected live performance - ONE LUSH STORE.

That sums up my vacation except to say that I was extremely happy to meet, first TenorSaxy then Weltek and Ayak. Sorry to miss HD and Boo. HD was, again, probably entirely my fault with bad planning and Boo was again the fault of the airline and travel plans. I was fairly successful at the casino and came home with the cash I took with me. And I found out at 6:30 that Chris Rock was performing at the casino and was in my seat by 7:45. He's is amazing! At Lush I bought: Ultimate Shin bar shampoo, some solid conditioner, a candy bar bubble bath, and a show thingie. Dbf bought a massage bar and we got a free bomb.

A successful and enjoyable trip. I'll be in Chicago in 10 days. **hops**

pictures to come.

It's official

2008-07-22T22:48:00.002-04:00

The doctor's office called today. My right carotid artery is 100% blocked and the left one is 60-80% blocked. I'm waiting on a call with an appointment with a vascular surgeon.

We are leaving Columbus for Montpelier, VT on August 7th. We plan to stay there, somewhere in New Hampshire, Bar Harbor in Maine, Boston, perhaps in Connecticut, maybe Atlantic City, Dover, Delaware.

Any ideas of what we can't miss?

Counseling

2008-07-18T09:32:00.003-04:00

Have any of you been in counseling? I found it very helpful during my son's teenage years as well as the divorce period.

Rehab had me fill out a questionnaire about depression. Of course it showed that I'm depressed. Who wouldn't be with my many diagnosis'? But then depression has been a life long problem for me.

Yesterday was a busy day. I went to a Stop Smoking one on one, did my exercises at the rehab center, and then meet with a counselor. I blabber on and he calmly gave me feedback. Evidently he's a believer in the inner child because he brought it up a couple of times and asked me questions about my parents and how I feel they treated me. He also suggested a book about living in the now. All this is because I evidently hate myself or I'd quit smoking.

So Bravie - tell me how it really was quitting. If you okay it I'd like to call you and get your experience. I think I have your number from a night of drinking milk and Weltek calling me.

For relaxation he asked me what I like to do - what relaxes me - what makes me happy. So what makes you happy? What activities do you enjoy? These questions are for you'all. I answered with three: driving my convertible (I just got it fixed after two years of it being sick), swimming, and traveling. I can now do the driving if I can afford the gas. I get a free, wind swept feeling driving a convertible. It's much safer than a motorcycle. Swimming is something I love. Well not exactly swimming just being in the water. I can lay on my back for many, many minutes without moving a muscle. It's so relaxing. I don't have a pool - boo. Travel is soooo expensive. So on the drive home I brainstormed for something I could do that I would enjoy. There are the normal answers of my children, my husband (for those with one). Oh yes, I also enjoy spending time with my bff. She's in Virginia and I can't tag along 24/7. Other than family what do you peeps enjoy.

Also during my drive I thought of all the peeps I've come to know in this box and came up with three of you that I always enjoy. There are three or five or seven others that I enjoy greatly also but haven't followed as closely. The three of you seem so grounded and I've never read a post or entry that shows an out of control ego or judgement of others. Just all around good people. I'm glad I've had the opportunity to laugh and sometimes cry with you amazing peeps. Maybe later I'll do an praising entry for each of you. Hints: one I've met, one I'll meet soon, and one I hope to meet.

Does living in the now mean I don't look around the house and see all that I need to do?

Update: Tuesday I had the ultrasound of my carotid arteries. My doctor is on vacation this week so I guess I'll know the results early next week. My neck is aching more than I remember. I'm guessing that I'm just more aware of it.

I'm 70% sure dbf (we are still trying to get the love back) are doing New England in August. Anyone between Columbus and Maine who have time - let's do lunch - or whatever.

Then Chicago.

Rehab

2008-07-01T10:17:00.002-04:00

Cardiac rehab starts today. However I haven't heard from the neurologist about my neck MRA.
This makes me nervous. Friday when I got home I realized I couldn't feel a pulse on the right side of my neck. Then Sunday I felt it - weak but there.

I did get out of the house Sunday and went to Com Fest. I walked around for about two hours until a storm came. It was nice to be out.

Since reading Nineteen Minutes I've also read Fearless Fourteen and The Kite Runner. The Kite Runner I read yesterday. Actually I did nothing else yesterday.

I just need to get on with it and stop being so fearful. Today is, hopefully, the start of living again.

I'm off to see if I can get Water for Elephants.

Really? Really!!

2008-06-27T15:19:00.002-04:00

Today is Friday. I returned to the neurosurgeon to have a follow-up MRI, actually a MRA. This was at 8:30 this morning. I waited and waited. Then I was to see the doctor. I waited and waited. The original reason for seeing her was what the reader of my first MRI thought could be an aneurysm. I may have mentioned that. She said that the area of concern was slightly enlarged but not of consequence. However........however, it seems my carotid artery is completely blocked. As she was explaining this my mouth was agape and my eyes blurred. WTF. I thought you died if this happened. She explained that there are four arteries to the brain. Yahoo says there is a carotid on both sides (news to me) and they each branch. Yahoo also talks about surgery but said that if it is 100% blocked surgery isn't done.

She asked me to return for a neck MRA. I left at 11:30 and had to return at 1:45. I shopped for a few things I needed. I had the second test, with dye, and left.

This is what I hate. Waiting for a doctor to tell me what they suggest.

I just want a total body scan!!

Oh, I spent the weekend in WV trying to help my brother, son and niece move. It was a cluster-fvck.

I'm talkative when I'm sick - aren't I.

It Could Only Happen to Me!

2008-06-20T09:09:00.003-04:00

The title of my blog.

When I visited my family doctor Monday she signed me up for a MRI. I was having headaches which are rare. Due to having a brain tumor (non-cancerous mengioma (sp)) removed in 1998 and the fact that my neurosurgeon retired three years ago she wanted to re-check my brain. I agreed because I never turn down test. I felt all would be ok.

Thursday (yesterday) my doctor's office called and said, "We have made you an appointment with the same neurosurgery group, Dr. so and so. She can see you tomorrow at 11." Sensing my wonder she asked, "Have the nurses called you to discuss your MRI?" No. "Well you have an aneurysm." As I said - IT COULD ONLY HAPPEN TO ME.

Just to summarized my woes:

1. 1998 in the middle of a divorce - I have a brain tumor
2. Christmas eve 2002 at 2:00 A.M. my house burns almost to the ground.
3. April 2004 I break my hip.
4. May 2005 I have my first heart attack.
5. June 2006 I have hip replacement.
6. 2007 was healthy but I move out from DBF.
7. This May - see below.
8. Now this!!

Soon I will be full of metal.

More on each later.

On the bright side I have reservations in Chicago and am looking forward to it. I planted some annuals Wednesday and my gardens are looking okay. I have masses of thistle weeds that I can conquer.

I cleaned the bathroom walls and floor today. Off to take a shower and do the sink and tub.

Time

2008-06-18T07:44:00.003-04:00

We all dream of being off work and having more time. Right now I have all the time I need. Being of weakened condition, or out of fear, I've been lazy.
I have spent quite a bit of time sitting on my deck listening to the bird. We have so many birds. I never knew this before. I guess I was so busy rushing around to sit and listen. There are two bluejays. I think they are very attractive birds. I've heard they are very mean also. I've been trying to get a good picture of one of them. He lands on my deck when I'm sitting there. My cat doesn't like it at tal.

He's blurry.
My cat.

I don't remember when the trees in the neighborhood became real trees. When we moved in in 1979 they were babies.

It looks like a forest.

Flower picture again:

Life and death - I spent a lot of time on these.

What am I going to do with the rest of my life? Well, I went to an Obama meeting last night. They are attempting to get neighborhood captains for voter registration and house meetings. In downtown Columbus we have huge, huge 4th of July fireworks downtown. There will be an Obama booth and they need volunteers. I love working booths at fairs. You meet so many people. I want to volunteer but I'm not sure I can take the heat yet.

I'll probably drive to WV tomorrow to visit my brother and oldest.

Morning shows - I prefer Good Morning America.

Enjoy the sound of birds!

The low down

2008-06-10T03:59:00.002-04:00

Well, Saturday before last, started as most Saturday's do. I got up, ran an errand or two, did a little gardening. I got in the shower around 1:00. This is when I started feeling badly. My chest felt tight and my left arm felt weak. I tried to talk myself out of feeling odd. I started and stopped washing a couple of times. Then I just gave up, got out and laid on the bed. I put a Nitro under my tongue. It didn't help. I tried another. This one helped a little so I was encouraged. I got up to go to the bathroom and the discomforted started in full force. I returned to the bed and took another nitro.

At this time the arguing with myself began. Should I call the squad? Of course not! Yep, I'd better do it. Nope, I'll be ok. Time is important. Back and forth.

When I finally called I almost hung up. Once 911 answers you are committed. I gave them the information and got up to get dressed. Here I debated on what to wear (bra? because of the EKG wires). I got dressed, with bra, and went and sat on the porch. Sitting on the porch I called boyfriend and left a message. A friend of my son's is staying with us and I told him to call my son. Squad came, I walked into the grass to the stretcher. They started an IV (in my hand which I usually don't mind but he hit a nerve for my middle finger's knuckle and ouch it hurt). On the way we go. Now this part I like - the cute firemen; the banter; the being important part.

We arrive at the EMR. Vitals are taken, EKG done. The girl typing on the computer is asking me soooo many questions and I'm beginning to hurt. I tell her I don't want to answer all these questions. She gets huffy and says, "When the doctor comes he will ask me lots of questions." I reply, "then let him". She and her partner leave the room in a huff. Now this room is in the middle of nowhere (as EMR's go). No desk, no people millin about people. I'm left there for quite some time. I manage to get the side of the bed down and get to my purse and get my cell phone. I call my boyfriend again and talk to him. I call my movie friend and leave her a message. I wait. I wait. It's beginning to be more and more uncomfortable. One of the Squad guys walk by and see me bent over and rocking myself. He runs off to get someone. He returns and tells me that he told them and that he "guessed" they would be right here.

Finally the doctor arrives, sits on my bed, and in a condescening voice asks, "What do you think is wrong with you?". I blabber about the discomfort in my chest, arm, neck. I compare it to my last heart attack.

He says, "Well your vitals are normal and so is your EKG. So what do you really think is wrong? I think you may just be hyperventilating!"

When I tell it, at this part, I like to say that I looked and him and said, "I'll show you what's wrong!!". In reality I looked at him and said, "Well it hurts more than last time. I think I'm having a heart attack. (Suddenly my hands begin to fell numb and I lean back, lift them and look at them) I may be hyperventilating because my hands are numb."

At this point, according to who you talk to, I flat lined, coded, or as my cardiologist put it - my heart began producing a rythym that isn't conductive to life.

Next thing I know I'm looking into the faces of strangers who all have an odd look on their faces. It's so plain and vivid to me. Bright lights and these odd faces looking down at me. Then my boyfriend is on my right side. I just kept looking around the faces when a lady to my left stands up and announces that she is from chappel services and that it is normal procedure for her to be here to support the relatives of any patient that codes. I looked around the faces again and ask, "Who coded?" To which they responded, "You did". Wwwwhhhhaaaatttt?

At this point I'm vaguely aware of conversation as to whether I shoud be taken to the cath lab now or whether my cardiologist likes to first see me in EMR. I am whisked though the hall way to the cath lab where a doctor I've never seen before announces that I'm having a heart attack and he is going to fix me. I am vaguely aware of them prepping me, and me tellining the doc my story ( Of I'll show you) when I feel like someone stabbed me in the groin. The doc says that that is just the numbing process to which I reply I don't think so.

Sigh.

Next thing I remember is voices telling me to lay still, explaining that a nurse will be standing by me applying pressure to my groin and my chest feeling like a hot poker has been applied to it. My boyfriend is there for a minute looking pained, my son appears, then my ex, then my movie friend (who I remember almost getting run over by a big machine), my sister who I ask, "How did you hear?" We've been in a sorta feud for awhile.

The horrible news that I once again coded in the cath lab is told. The nurse is leaning on my groin and I can't move my head or right leg for 6 hours. I'm very tired and I'm told to lay still and breathe. And the pain in my chest is from them beating my chest, the paddles, or as I like to say, "Them throwing me around like a rag doll!".

Well, Kimmah, that's the story. I got out Wednesday where another story begins. I'll keep that one for later.

Sigh again. I think I need a new heart. I also think I need to make some life changes.

Damn It

2008-06-05T21:36:00.001-04:00

Another Heart Attack. Saturday.

I'm home now.

Damn It.

I was supposed to make my Chicago reservations. I'll try tomorrow or this weekend.

Damn It.

New View of Flowers in my Gaenrd

2008-05-12T20:02:00.002-04:00

This is a Giant Allium.

This is a tulip.

This is a Columbine.

This is a creeping phlox.

Aren't they more beautiful close up?

It's quite summer-i-ly in Ohio

2008-01-08T14:12:00.000-05:00

Well, I’m still kicking.

It was an eventful year last year. This year looks to be a challenge with the probability of the 25-year job ending. I tend to look at it as a new chapter in a rather naive way without taking into consideration the financial aspect.

I’ve been taking my Chantrix to try and curb the desire to smoke. It actually helps but I haven’t given it up totally. The dreams I get with the medication are vivid. I dream of the normal stuff I always have – high school things, old friends, occasionally Cary (she has a way of getting in doesn’t she!), and lately Kim. I’ve begun to dream some Canadian dreams also. See you guys are good for me.

I check the blogs yesterday and loved Kimmah’s design a dress, so here’s mine: http://bravotv-dev.console.net/PR4DEV/games/design_challenge?design=40802
It’s all about the flip-flops. You know that – right?

I’m excited for another BB. I don’t care how cheesy the “rush to air” show is I’ll probably be glued to the set. I’m growing tired the TV available.

THERE IT IS FOLKS AN UPDATE!

Rounds

2007-10-29T10:38:00.000-04:00

I made the bloggie rounds today. Impressions: CoCo has the cutest kids I've ever seen; Monsty is gone, at least I can't access her blog; there's pictures of a banana with glasses; Kim's blog is going strong and I so enjoy it; Arkie's is so conversational; Syren is missing as I have been; Cat never poops; Mark had a close call; Nutzy is driving by; Augie has taken a 6 week break; Glowie is going to be pregnant in '08.

My today issue is my calf muscles. My Dbf is putting his house up for sale so I agreed to paint while he worked this weekend. Fact - ladders have a small rung to stand on which makes a user stand on their toes, or at best, the front of their foot. My calf muscles are bleeding muscle blood. When I got up this morning I almost hit the floor from the pain. This indicates that I need a treadmill on a regular basis.

Life changing news: My plant is closing and the work is going to Mexico with final test in Texas. Whether I will have a job in '08 is up in the air. The Union is meeting with the company to work out the specifics. The good news is that I am pension eligible and I'll get around $90,000 when I leave. The bad news is my pension is too small to live on and if I don't invest the $$ the taxes will take most of it.

Renewed patriotic actions: I've renewed my usual "Buy American" banner. Where will us Americans work? What happens when we are no longer the monetary giants of the world? The slippery slop, in my opinion, will bottom out in 50 years or less. When we are no longer a monetary giant we are no longer a military giant. We've pissed off most of the world at this point and will be no more valuable than, say, Macedonia. I'm thankful for the time I was born and the place I was born. My grandkids, no so good for them.

Switch: OT has been quite the playground. I do read the posts every weekday but have become mainly a lurker.

First frost day was today. bbbrrrrrrr!

Blah blah

2007-10-04T08:13:00.000-04:00

I haven't been very social the past weeks. Nothing particularly wrong.

I have developed some new insights to the people around me. I am an easy mark. I strongly believe that most people are good and since "most" doesn't equal "all" I often don't realize evil until it bites me.

On the home front: my oldest moved to WV and my youngest has a job!!! He has a real job, however since it's construction related it may not last the entire winter. But he is paying his bills!! I've done some upkeep on the house.

On the job front: zzzzzzzz!

Although I dread the coming winter I do like the cooler nights.

OH, a picture was posted on OT a couple weeks ago that left me very very very scared (and scarred). I've spent most of my online time over there but hope to blog-hop the rest of the week.

Anyone with word on Survey. I sent a card a month ago but no word.

Anyone enjoying the new tv season. I love Cane, maybe because I love Jimmy Smits. I do DVR quite a few shows but none have me hooked. The last two shows that hooked me didn't last a season. Survivor doesn't really interest me tho I'm watching.

Ho Hum!

10 Favorites...
Favorite Color: Green
Favorite Food: Mexican
Favorite Band: Journey with Steve Perry
Favorite Movie: Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner
Favorite Sport: Futbot (Soccer)
Favorite Season: Spring
Favorite Day Of the Week: Saturday
Favorite Ice Cream Flavor: Chocolate
Favorite Time of Day: Early a.m. before the world gets noisy

9 Currents...
Current Mood: Bored
Taste: Caesar Salad
Clothes: Jean shorts, vibrant pink short sleeve top, light blue sandals
Current Computer Background: Flowers
Current Finger/Toenail Color: Plumy color on toes
Current Time: 10:42 a.m.
Current Surroundings: messy office
Current Annoyance(s): Fatigue
Current Thought: Why am I tired?

8 Firsts...
First Best Friend: Kathy
First Love: Barry
First Screen Name: dunno
First Pet: Taffy
First Piercing: Ears
First Crush: Adam Cartright
First Music: Temptations
First Car: Green 1971 Pinto7

Last...
Last Cigarette: 10 mins
Last Drink: Grand Marnier Friday evening - straight
Last Car Ride: On way to work
Last Text Message: I don't text message
Last Movie Seen: (at the theatre) The Bourne Ultimatum
Last Phone call: Son
Last CD Played: Barbra Streisand

6 Have You Ever...
Have You Ever Dated One Of Your Best Friends: Yes
Have you Ever Broken the Law: Yes
Have You Ever Been Arrested: Yes - small incident when I was 18 yrs, 10 days
Have You Ever Skinny Dipped: No
Have You Ever Been on TV: No
Have You Ever Kissed Someone You Didn't Know: Yes

5 Things...
You're Wearing: Jean shorts, vibrant pink short sleeve top, light blue sandals
You Did Last Night: Read
You Can Hear Right Now: The cooling system above my head
You Can't Live Without: Family
Do When You're Bored: Watch TV

4 Places You've Been To: **we were just talking about these prepositions at the end!!**

1. San Francisco
2. Hawaii
3. NYC
4. Cancun

3 People You Can Tell Anything To:
Candi, Darcy, youngest sister

2 Choices...
1. Black or White: Black
2. Hot or Cold: Hot

1 Person You'd Do Anything For:
Candi

Pink

2007-09-08T13:26:00.000-04:00

It's a pink T. For some reason it gave me a huge round white spot on my check.

I've nothing really interesting to report. Just wanted to thank my t-gifter.

Insanity or Why me

2007-08-28T08:37:00.001-04:00

1. I seem to have a problem. I wake up every night somewhere between 2 and 4. Last night when I woke up I realized I was having a bad dream. My mouth was cotton and my heart was racing. I thought I was going over the edge, into the abyss. I took a pain pill, for no apparent reason other than they make me sleep. I woke up today feeling wonderful. I can see the attraction for abuse here.

2. I completed my gifting. As usual I'm pretty insecure about whether it will be well received. I got something in a cool shade of pink!

3. My laptop is being looked at for damage assessment.

4. Big Brother time of the year makes me manic.

5. Do kids ever grow up? Seriously! Are you all grown?

6. Lists make me melancholy. See below.

7. What's the meaning of life? Is it to squeeze every enjoyment out? Is it to experience pain? Is it just boredom? Procreation? Recreation? Separation? Castration? Emulation? *now I'm just being silly*

8. Is it true that if you want to emigrate to Canada you need $10,000 in cash? Or is it $100,000? Someone at work told me that. I have a total of: One dollar two ninety-nine. What happened to your poor and weary? Oh, that's us.

9. It sure has been hot. People are wanting fall. Not me. The boredom and darkness of winter are close enough. I'll take hot over cold.

10. I ran into a neighbor at the grocery last night. I haven't seen her for a couple of years. She talked to me for 15-20 minutes in front of the frozen pizza case. I just wanted to get home and put the pizza in the oven.

11. I've heard that winning the lottery can make you miserable. I want to be miserable as I travel around visiting all of you. Please make me miserable.

12. I'm thinking about learning Spanish. Is it to late for my brain to comprehend?

eta:

14. *giggle* There are just some things that need to be said. If said things are bothering you for over an hour, then it's best to get it out. right? will i be banned? have i said lately that i ****dispise**** him. Some find him bravely trying to get his point across, i find him ignorant and purposely inciting.

Trucker Woman

2007-08-17T10:35:00.000-04:00

I will spare you most of the miserable trip last Friday. Suffice to say that I had airline delays and missed connections and arrived to find the truck hadn't even been rented. I wanted to get on the road almost as soon as I arrived so I wouldn't spend the entire weekend driving.

We finally left West Palm at 5:00 p.m. and spent the night somewhere in bumfuckGeorgia. Saturday we left bumfuckGeorgia and drove all the way to Ohio. Well, we didn't, I did. Yep I drove 100% of the time.

Unfortunately I made a comment about truck drivers and hemorrhoids which made my "childbirth" hemorrhoids protrude.

Damn, I think I could get a new profession. I became a pro truck driver.

Anyone want to see America and join my trucker team?

I'm back

2007-08-08T12:36:00.000-04:00

I'm back from our vacation to Florida.

When dbf said he would like to drive through Atlanta on the way to Florida (for different scenery), I quickly said "Let's do it". I was thinking about two of my all time favorite peeps living in Atlanta. I sent a message to said peeps and asked if they were available for lunch on Friday. Yes, was the reply. I was sooooo excited. Then we started out Thursday and stayed in Tennessee. Friday on the way to Atlanta I started wondering why, why did I ask for lunch. What if they don't like me? Am I causing an inconvenience? What will I say?

Then I told my self, "everyone does it, even Nutzy now". But, Nutzy is smart and funny! Geezzee peezzee. There were phone calls back and forth.

We arrived at the designated lunch locale first- phew! Then they came. I was instantly in love. With all four of them. Although I was still nervous I've known since my first time on OT that I would absolutely love both of them. And the kids were sooo cute.

Yes, I met Syren and CSTL, Ryan and James. I have two wonderful pictures but my 'puter at home is broken and my computer at work doesn't have a USB port. I'll have my dbf email the pics here at work so I can post them.

Suffice to say, I'm so glad I came out of my box and asked for lunch. Love you two!!

The rest of the trip was good also. We swam, visited flee markets, drove to South Beach and a short distance out to the Keys. I finished Middlesex. I meet another of his sisters - this one I like alot. His sister and parents came to the hotel and spent two nights with us. Said sister and I sat at the Tiki bar, drank strawberry daiquiris and had a good time. A band played with some awesome singers. They sang mainly 50's and 60's. I especially liked the Dean Martin song. What I enjoyed the most was the crowd. It was an older crowd, 40 - 80. I loved that the people of the higher age were having a blast, singing and dancing. If I make 80 I want to sing and dance.

On the way back we stopped at my sister's in NC (it was 102) and the next day stopped at my brother's in WV. My oldest moved to WV and is living with my brother and trying to get a job at the Toyota plant in Buffalo. Keep your fingers crossed for him.

Guess what. I have to fly to Florida Friday a.m. to help my friend drive the moving truck back to Ohio. I just made that drive. The drive was fun but the drive in a damn truck will be hell. Why?

2007-07-14T15:47:00.000-04:00

This is my sister's kids.
This photo gives many possibilities. Which is the youngest? Which is me? Which is my brother (*giggle*)?

This is my son's friend's little boy - cutie!
This is also on of my son's friend's (the one who just joined the Army) little girl. The curly hair is cute now, but she will hate it later

Kids are so cute.

*sticks tongue out at Seattle peeps!

Confusion

2007-07-12T10:41:00.001-04:00

My mind is racing from one thing to another. Funny, though, I'm basically not doing anything. I can't seem to focus.

I finished reading American Fascists - The Religious Right and Their War on America. Wow, worthwhile reading for anyone who wants to find the underlying reasons why VP Cheney thinks he's King.

A Republican friend of my said he would read the book if I read 100 People Who are Screwing Up America. I did. Didn't impress me. Michael Moore was #1 - snicker. If I had to choose between fearing Michael Moore and Pat Robertson I wouldn't pick a film maker.

My family was here over the weekend. I always enjoy being with them. For me, it's the most comfortable situation I can imagine. All the shared history. We have differences in opinions, but not radical differences. I'm always baffled by people who don't feel this connection with family. My brother was a pretty despicable person, but in my view, he was my mother's son - she loved him - so I did also. And, under his thieving, self-centered soul, there were some good qualities. I sum it up by a bad analogy: If a friend stole $10 from a neighbor I would be upset - if they stole it from my family I'd be insanely angry. Maybe that sense of family comes from my Kentucky roots and the Hatfields and McCoys - *giggle*. At least for us, when it comes right down to it, there will never be anyone except family when things go terribly wrong. Blood family that is.

My son was picked up for questioning and returned home. Maybe my prayers were heard. On the same vein as above, my younger son had to make a choice between his closest friend and his brother. I've very proud to report he chose his brother.

Right now I'm reading one of Sylvia Browne's books "If You Could See What I See". My sister has announced that she is a Gnostic based on Sylvia's beliefs. I guess you could say I'm searching for my spirituality.

My 5 state road trip was to begin Friday. *sigh*

My boys are in WV visiting my brother and his daughter who won the title of Miss (insert county name). She will preside over the fair next week. Last weekend she had a dance competition in my town and we all went to watch her, in shifts. She's very pretty and talented. We want her to try for Miss WV. I've been told that it includes alot of fund raising and corporate sponsors. After the fair I'm going to see if I can garner support for this. My x's family are also from WV, another part, but perhaps through them I can get some fund raising in their part of the state. I'll go to the site and try to get a picture.

Dbf and I are going to Florida in two weeks. I pay for the time share monthly and he is going to pay for most of the expenses during the week, so it's basically free for me. I would have preferred Seattle but don't have the extra cash. A week at a beach may be what I need, however.

Just wanted to let you know that things are good.

Have fun!

Lookee what I found.

Sob

2007-07-02T09:42:00.001-04:00

A very serious incident happened Thursday night. My son's actions may land him in jail. I'm so sad. He needs someone beside me to talk with. There is no one. I'm trying to decide how to get a psychologist or something. I actually considered taking him out of state. Instead we holed up in the house Friday through Sunday. I had to come back to work today. I'm worried about his mental state also.

After sitting around Friday and Saturday I got busy yesterday. I pulled all the blinds down and scrubbed them in the bath tub and then hung them outside. I cleaned all the ceiling fans, applied Old English to the one bed, washed all the sheets and comforters, swept all the floors. My son cleaned my gutters and I did some weeding. While weeding I felt my hip pop out and back in slightly. That was scarey. I would stop for a few seconds to watch the concert for Diana.

My family is coming over next weekend for the 4th. Let's see there is: my sister from North Carolina and her husband and their 3 kids; my brother from West Virginia and his 2 kids; my other sister who lives across town and her daughter. I'm calling my aunt tonight. I always enjoy these get togethers.

I'm suffering from a summer cold. I'm on Dayquil and Nightquil.

I'm glad it isn't just me who is locked out over there.

For some reason I watched the finale of Charm School. I didn't like any of these girls very much but I liked the girl who won the least. Yeah, yeah a sad story perhaps but she is anything but charming. I don't even know her name (or any of the other's). Saphy something or the other.

I also watched "The Last King of Scotland" about the reign of Amin. That was brutal. I'm still reading "American Fascists". I recommend it for serious reading.

The realization that there is more evil in the world than I've allowed myself to believe is scary.

Will the meek inherit the world or will evil rule forever? I'm surrounded by insanity and it is closing in.

Aren't you glad you stopped by today. *sigh*

I'm furious today

2007-06-28T14:31:00.000-04:00

After spending some time being abused by a bill collection pened this to her company:

Amy was extremely rude and, having all the power in the situation, bullied me. She used these tactics continuously during the call. She basically called me a liar by saying, “You didn’t pay this on-line or I would be able to pull up the information”. As evidenced by the attached, this is untrue. Being so confident that she was the only “right one” and having no true conversation ability, she just kept repeating herself over and over, cutting me off. Of course, as bullies do, she accused me of the behavior she was exhibiting. She rambled on and on, getting louder as she spoke telling me not to talk over her. When she would take a breath or temporarily stop rambling, I would ask if I could talk to explain. That set her off to rambling again. I asked numerous times to talk to her supervisor. She treated this request by ranting about my uselessness and her extreme abilities. It only takes one over-aggressive bully to drain the energy from a person in my situation. This letter is sent in hopes that you have a recording of this call, at 12:19 p.m. on 6/28, so you can ascertain Amy’s attitude and another person doesn’t have to suffer her hostility.

A bit

2007-06-20T14:31:00.000-04:00

1. As you all know I like British accents and admire their use of language. Since I can’t remember all their phrases and am not good at the inflection needed I’m starting small. I’ve lately heard the term “a bit” used, as in “We need to discuss this for a bit”. I know, kinda lame, but I’m incorporating it into my everyday language.

2. There is a big internet crack down going on here at work. Evidently, an hourly was emailing some porn like information. He was walked out and from what I’ve heard 3 supervisor’s computers have been confiscated. I spend so much time on OT and reading here that I’m going to have to limit my use, for a bit.

3. I just receive a call from my mortgage insurance lady telling me that my house didn’t pass inspection for insurance. The hand railing up to my stoop is missing. I have 2 weeks to get a replacement. I have no money for it. I’m going to have to be a bit creative to replace it.

4. I watched my recording of the Princes of England last night. That Harry is such a hoot. I could become a cougar if I could get a bit of him. I’d only use him for a bit. That face, that wonderful red hair, that sarcastic humor – swoon.

5. I had a going away party for my son’s friend this past Saturday. He is joining the Army and leaves this Sunday. Unfortunately, his family (other than his drunken mother) didn’t take the time to come. We had a good time anyway. It’s so sad that no one in his family has a stable life so that he can leave his possessions with them. That is except his grandma who is the sweetest lady. I wonder how she gave birth to a bunch of hoodlums. It’s a bit disheartening.

6. I picked up the book American Fascists – The Christian Right and the War on America at the library Monday. I just started reading it today and I’m so into it. The author (Chris Hedges) has all my instinctual thought perfectly on display. I’ve only been reading it for a bit (25 pages) and I could have 100 quotes already. For instance:

Faith presupposes that we cannot know. We can never know. Those who claim to know what life means play God. These false prophets – the Pat Robertsons, the Jerry Fallwells and the James Dobsons – clutching to the Bible, offering to lead us back to a mythical paradise and an impossible, unachievable happiness and security at once seductive and empowering. They ask us to hand over moral choice and responsibility to them. They will tell us how to act, how to live, and in the process they elevate themselves above us. They remove the anxiety of moral choice, the fundamental anxiety of human existence. This is part of their attraction. They give us the rules by which we live. But once we hand over this anxiety and accept their authority, we become enslaved and they become our idols. And idols, as the Bible never ceases to tell us, destroy.

And

Dominionism, born out of a theology know as Christian re-constructionism, seeks to politicize faith. It has, like all fascist movements, a belief in magic along with leadership adoration and a strident call for moral and physical supremacy of a master race, in this case American Christians. It also has, like facist movements, an ill defined and shifting set of beliefs, some of which contradict one another. For instance, focus on what I say, not how I act.

And

God has not chosen Americans as a people above others. The beliefs of Christians are as flawed and imperfect as all religious beliefs.

I would like to do this as a book club discussion with the pre’s of the world.

7. And lastly, I have been watching recordings of “The Actor’s Studio” in the absence of any other TV of interest. I do love watching these interviews. I find interest in their early life, their family situation as a child, what drives them to act and seeing them as a real person instead of a character. My favorites are Angelina (what a complex character she is), Dustin Hoffman, Al Pacino – well I enjoy almost all of them. From the show’s questionnaire develop by Bernard someoneortheother:

What is you favorite sound?
What is your least favorite sound?
What profession would you like to try?
What profession would you never want to attempt?
What is your favorite curse word?
If heaven exists, what would you like God to say to you when you reach the pearly gates?

Mine:
Birds chirping on a clear, cool spring/summer morning.
Doors slamming
Actually, acting
Police Officer
My favorite would have to be the one I save for RARE occasions, and won’t even type out in full – gdamn
You were correct all along and you won’t see any of the “moral majority” here, they are with the child molesters. Enjoy your stay!

8. My laptop is broken. WTF will I do during Big Brother if I can blog at home. Let’s just pray that I don’t get in trouble here at work (because we all know that I won’t be able to resist the threads) and forced to retire.

9. OT has been a bit fun lately.

10. Lastly, really this time. My britches are a bit in a bunch because I can't go to Seattle!

One word

2007-06-14T14:52:00.000-04:00

1. Where is your cell phone?
desk
2. You're single/taken?
both
3. Your hair?
curly
4. Your mother?
sad
5. Your father?
kind
6. Your favorite thing?
travel
7. Your dream last night?
forgetable
8. Your favorite drink?
coke
9. Your dream car?
thunderbird
10. The room you're in?
office
11. Your ex?
alcoholic
12. Your fear?
death
13. Where were you last night?
bed
14. what you're not?
patient
15. Muffins?
yummy
16. One of your wish list items?
health
17. The last thing you did?
smoked
18.What are you wearing?
regular
19. Your pet or pets?
smokeymokeymokes
20. Your computer?
dead
21. Your life?
fun
22. Your mood?
exhausted
23. Missing some one?
many
24. Your car?
fixed
25. Your work?
boring
26.Like someone?
most
27. Your favorite color?
green
28. When is the last time you laughed real hard?
!ear
29. Crush's first name?
nic
30. Dream job?
actor

This and That

2007-06-07T18:08:00.000-04:00

I've decided to let my hair do what it wants. It's too damn hot to straighten it. I'm considering cutting it off again. My hair is such a problem to me.

I thought I'd be funny and took this picture in Vegas and was going to label it "Happy to be meeting Boo".

This one is "Sad because Bravie kept Boo in SF".

And, I'm making a list of what I wear each day and judging them. I need to weed out some of my clothes. I have too many clothes and some look hideous on me. I have the opposite of anorexia - the body image part. I think I'm thinner than I am. When I see a picture I can't believe I'm this fat. I've lost 17 pounds, but still. I only gain weight in one place - mid section. I have no butt, skinny arms and legs and no extra rolls on my back.

Have I mentioned how happy I am that I can walk without pain. When I get melancholy I try to remember the pain I had for two years. I'm going to go to all the festivals downtown this year. And I'm even going to the State Fair. I CAN WALK.

I am a great aunt to these lovely children.

I'm thinking that time is fleeting.

Lookee what I did again

2007-06-05T20:08:00.001-04:00

As soon as I moved back to my house I had to paint my wall.

And a pic of my Kachina Dolls.

Quiz

2007-05-23T10:49:00.000-04:00

I really don't want to do the whole quiz, but a friend told me a joke yesterday which fits the quiz.

STATE TO DISPOSE OF: Idaho because no on wants to be Ms. I Da HO.

That's all.

IT'S FRIDAY

2007-05-18T09:22:00.001-04:00

Happy dance.

That's all!

Faux Paux

2007-05-16T13:43:00.000-04:00

1. Is that how it's speeled? How can something be spelled like that but be pronounced foo paw? Anyhoo, I have a fashion faux paux today. I wore white shoes before Memorial Day. I know, it's shameful! I apologized to the guys in the smoke shack today and they said they'd try to forgive me.

2. Moving is awful! I've moved 99% of my clothes, 99% of my garage stuff and tools. I also moved all my bedroom furniture and the kitchen table. Oh and 99% of my kitchen stuff. The rest, which is a lot, I could probably live without. Why do I have so much stuff.

3. I have my favorite rings on today. They are sapphires set in white gold. Two of the rings are a dark blue, the other a more medium blue. I'm going to try to sell some of my rings on e-bay, once I figure out how that works. I bought too many and I need some cash.

4. I just found out (last night) that my hanger-on boarder (he was living there with my sons) is still on heroin. WTF! He told me that he quit. My sons are a lot like me and my sister in that we never tell secrets until we get mad. My son was quite upset with him and spouted all kinds of stuff. For some time now I've been, gently, telling him he has to leave. He's had many excuses and has told me many times he was going to stay with either his dad (another city up north) or his mother. I do have trouble kicking anyone to the street. The homeless population is bad enough. But he has to go. As soon as he comes out of his room when I'm home I'll get stern. Being home feels good, abeit with a few problems like this.

5. My Dbf and I are still "seeing" each other. He has turned into the nice, kind, thrifty, helpful, cheerful boy scout that he was before we moved into his house. Men!

6. Someone keeps buying hand lotion and putting it in the restroom at work. It's a nice gesture but I never use it. Do you think people are using it before they wash their hands? Or using it and not washing their hands?

7. I just went back and put this in list format!

8. Seattle is probably out. I was so excited. My money situation has taken another turn downward. Plus there are only a few peeps going that I'm dying to meet.

9. Who was the "bitter old hag". I never figured that one out.

10. Over there, do you call each peeps and invite them to a thread jack? I can be there various times and nothing is happening. Then the next day, or later in the day, I see there has been all kinds of hilarity going on. I don't have much snark anyway. My brother found me hilarious, a few close friends do also. But in general, I'm too serious. Do you think Weltek and Bravie can refer me to a church that will help build my snar-i-ness?

I think I have to stop at ten, plus this.

Drunken Challenge

2007-05-07T15:57:00.000-04:00

It was good to talk to Kim (and hear Carey in the background) but I was bored to death in the SLC airport on the "lost day" traveling to Ohio from Vegas. Boo had such a good time in SF that she didn't return to Vegas with enough time for us to meet. It's okay (no it isn't), I'm glad she had a good trip (psych).

First off, my son won $800 the first day!!!!! Woo Hoo.

He proceeded to lose it all over the next two days.

The challenge: What OT peep would you like to have a date with and get to know better? Given my sexual orientation, that leaves me with only two choices: MTW or Boner, both married men. One of my bestest (Nutz) has dibs on MTW and I find Boner to be an extremely interesting Texan (yes there are a few). So Boner wins this privilege. (Help keep Geg off of me, 'k).

I so wanted to be in SF last week!

Why are no bloggers going to Seattle. Just me and Kim - WTF.

Free Day

2007-04-24T07:30:00.000-04:00

I'm at home today. Just because.

I've been busy both at work and at home. I'm in the process of moving back to my house and it's taking so long since I'm doing it myself. At work I was filling in for a co-worker who was on vacation in Costa Rica.

Not much else happening here.

Vegas next week.

Yea

2007-04-13T08:13:00.000-04:00

My tulips are standing tall right now. Maybe the freezing weather didn't kill them!

I've been thinking . . .

2007-04-09T10:00:00.000-04:00

I sometimes think about my grandmother and all she witnessed during her life. She was born in the late 1890's. She saw the emergence of cars, airplanes, not to mention living through both WW's, the depression. She lived to be 94.

During my life I've witnessed the Civil Rights Movement, the Women's movement, Vietnam and the resulting protests, the Flower Children of San Francisco, the fall of Apartheid in South Africa, the rise of the best Rock 'n Roll band of all time (Beatles) and the second (Stones), not to mention Jimi Hendrix and Janis Joplin. I've particularly enjoyed the music part of all of this. Music has expanded so much during my life.

The advances in medicine has allowed me to life much longer than I would have in an earlier time.

I never thought I travel on an airplane, my mother never did. I never thought I see anything outside Ohio, Kentucky, West Virginia, Virginia, or Michigan. My mother never did.

It's been fun! In three weeks I'll be on another airplane flying far away (Vegas). I'm anxious.

This cold front has me feeling hemmed in again.

Droopy

2007-04-05T08:18:00.000-04:00

I went outside Dbf's house to go to work today. I glanced at my spring flowers. They are ALL droopy. My Bleeding Heart is droopy. My tulips (the huge peony flowering ones) are droopy. Even my daffodils are droopy.

Augie, how is your spring garden?

And my "low fuel" light came on on the way to work.

It's 30 degrees here today - and it was 80 two days ago.

*sigh*

Hose?!?!?!

2007-04-03T09:57:00.000-04:00

On the way into work today I looked down on my pasty white legs and wondered:

1. Why do we call those things that are worn on our legs hose? A hose waters the garden and cleans the car. It took me a moment to think of another word for this uncomfortable accessory - stockings. So is it hose or stockings (or something else) to you?

2. Do any of you even still wear hose?

3. Do any of you remember hose before panty hose? The garter thingy. And I've seen in magazines that the garter made a comeback. Why? Other than panty liner menstrual pads, panty hose was the best invention. Why would one want to sit on a garter strap all day?

- - - - How can it be 80 in Ohio today but snow flurries are forcasted for Wednesday (tomorrow)?

Itty Bitty

2007-03-31T15:25:00.000-04:00

Pictures of my dearly departed Itty Bitty:

That's more like it

2007-03-27T10:20:00.000-04:00

Wow, what a difference the weather can make. I'm feeling more like me - much happier. And I'm now 10 pounds lighter and don't have to buy clothes in the Women's section. Okay, just barely into Misses, but there none the less.

Smokey is doing quite well. The test results, unfortunately, show that he has (or is a carrier) of Feline Leukemia. The vet and I were hoping that he is a carrier only. However, his blood tests show a decrease in white blood cells. The good news is that all his other blood tests are normal. His x-rays don't show any tumors. The x-rays do show a misshapen heart on the left side and she did detect a slight murmur. To have further testing on his heart is another $300, so I'm going to hope that his heart holds out. The vet is mixing up some medicine that we hope will boost his immune system and I will be forcing antibiotics down his throat for his mouth infection. The bill was only - $504. Geesh! However, since I don't take him to the vet for regular checkups, over his 11 years I guess that's not too much money.

Will my Vegas trip ever get here?

JULY TRIP

After the peep meet in Seattle I'm considering two different week long adventures:

The first is a trip down the coast first staying 2 or 3 days in Seaside, OR at a resort my timeshare owns. Then staying somewhere in Northern California for 2 or three days and maybe somewhere else. Then I would end my trip in my FAVORITE city San Francisco! Woo hoo I'd get to meet Bravie and the California peeps.

The other option is rather industrious. I would stay in Seaside the same two days. Then I would travel inland and spend one or two nights in Portland. From Portland I would drive 7 hours and spend a night in Boise (I've traveled through the upper part of Idaho but never spent any time there). The next day I would check out the Boise area and leisurely drive to Twin Falls, ID (2 1/2 hours) and spend the night. From Twin Falls I would again drive leisurely (3 1/2 hours) to Salt Lake City and spend the night (that would qualify me for visiting Utah). The next day I would hightail it to Reno (8 hours) where I would spend two nights. From Reno its a 4 hour or so trip to, yes, San Francisco where I would spend a night or two.

From what I've read the shore line in Washington, Oregon, and northern California is not a pleasant place to swim due to the water being cold. Is that true? Will it be warm enough to swim in July?

I'm leaning toward plan #2 as I enjoy driving and stopping wherever I find something interesting. And #2 will leave me with only New England to visit (well, honestly, also North Dakota - opps and Alaska). Then I can plan a Europe trip in a couple of years.

I've ordered the carpet for my house. I have decided to begin sleeping there when the carpet is installed (to protect it from my boys and their friends) and move the remainder of my stuff after that. I'm am moving very slowly. If the weather cooperates and the rain doesn't wash me out, I am moving something every two days or so.

Has spring put a boost in you?

For GLOWIE

2007-03-22T10:30:00.000-04:00

I've finally got a post for Glow. I watched Idol and took notes. These are all songs that I remember.

The first note I made was during Blake's performance. I was wowed! He made the song current and he had a hot sparkle in his eye.

I loved Lakisha's performance - so there judges. What do they insist on making the idols do songs that are 40 years old and then make comments about them acting 40 years older? Lakisha is so much more talented than Fantasia. Fantasia shouted where Lakisha proved that she can sing a soft, wonderful song without shouting. I only compare the two because my first impression with both was Arthea. Lakisha is going to be hard to beat based on voice alone.

Jordan was hot! I've liked her okay before, but tonight I was won over. Based on tonight's performance, along with Blake, she already has the "star" thing going on.

Sanjaya was horrible. Don't get me wrong I like Sanjaya just as I've loved the last idols that everyone hated. The red head (what'shisname) I loved him in a old-timer ballad way. Sanjaya's soft voice is good. Not everyone is the same. His fun voice is terrible but his performance was interesting in that it was different. That crying girl was hysterical.

Melinda is my favorite in that she is so Gladys Knight-ish. Gladys is one of my all time favorites. Melinda is a little timid and not as "hot" as Jordan, but she has an incredible voice.

I actually tried to vote for Blake but the number was busy immediately after and I wasn't motivated to continue.

OTHER NEWS: I'm going to Vegas when Boo is there. Yes, knowing she was going to be there at that time did influence my timing. I wanted to go NOW in March but moving the time out farther saved me $100 on both my son's and my ticket. The hotel is free for 2 nights. So I decided to go when she would be there. I get my FIRST peep meet. We will probably only have a short time - dinner or so - but I'm very excited.

And speaking of Glow, specifically her sig pic. I never look at men's crotches. Never. I look at their eyes, their hair, their everything else but have never looked there. I know there is talk about Phil's equipment (which honestly took me some time to figure out WTH everyone was talking about). Just the other day I looked at some (shhh)crotches. I wondered if that is the same as men oggling my oobies. Should we women stare at crotches? Is that that same? When I'm with a man I'm more interested in his spirit, his soul, his overall than his equipment. So I'm really a "size doesn't matter" girl.

Moving is a slow process. The rain has dampened my ability to throw stuff in my truck. After I get the majority of my stuff out and organized I will hire a mover for the furniture. Finally, I got my new front door put on the house. It's HOT! It's got the blinds between the glass. It really makes the entry lighter.

My kitty that I had put to sleep - I'm thinking she had the "tainted food" disease. I'm taking my Smokey to the vet tomorrow for a full work-up. They call it a senior check-up. He is 11 years old. I very seldom feed my cats wet food, only as a treat. I always use IAM's and had fed them a couple of cans during that period.

I'll blog about my proposed Seattle plans next!

61 degrees

2007-03-12T10:01:00.000-04:00

It's predicited to be 61 degrees today. Woo Hoo.

I don't want to jinx myself but I've lost 7 pounds.

Again I hope I don't jinx myself but I purchased an instant lottery ticket that I had to send in to get a chance to appear on the TV show to win some money.

I've decided to take a quick trip to Vegas. I wanted to go soon but the airfare is too high. If I move it out 4 weeks or so I can save $100 on the ticket. I have two free nights at Harrah's. Maybe I'll go when Boo is there!!

I'm moving back to my house. Now that the decision is made I feel good about it.

If Seattle gets underway, I may stay for a week and see Oregon and Northern California. I've never been to Oregon and it seems a shame to miss it when I'm out there. What is there to do in Oregon? I'm thinking of flying into Seattle and out of San Francisco - you know what that means!!!!

I need to find someone to put a new entry door in my house. Two of my son's friends have volunteered but haven't followed through.

My travel companion may be my oldest son. Or myself.

I'm stuck paying my youngest son's car payment again this month. That makes three. I may take the car (300M) and drive it until he gets another job.

A week from today is my brother's birthday, my bestest's birthday and my 24 year anniversary at work. Today is just another day!

Lottery

2007-03-06T08:57:00.000-05:00

The mega millions is at 350 million and some. Do you ever fantasize about winning? What would you do with that amount of money? Who would you share it with?

First to me is my family. Some people have feuds with their family. Perhaps some family member deserve being ignored. I don't know! My family consists of fairly normal people trying to survive. None of us are evil, nasty people.

I have a road trip planned if I ever win that kind of money. First I drive to my home town and find out what I can do to help my ex-brother-in-law and my niece. Then to West Virginia to my brother's. Next to North Carolina to my sister's. Then I'd come home and talk to my other sister.

I have: 1 brother, 2 sisters, 6 nieces, 1 nephew, 2 great-nieces and one great-nephew. I'd leave the nieces and nephews a trust to pay for their college. Two nieces graduate from High School this year. Both are beautiful young women - both I'd love to see have a career.

Then are my closest friends - Darcy, Candi, Barb, Keith, and I'll add Dbf here.

Then my foster-daughter.

Then my ex.

I fantasize about buying 10-20 acres of land with a pond and stream. Then I want to build three houses on the land: one for me, one for each son. The family farm!

I think I would buy a Thunderbird convertible.

I know I would buy a mobile home. Then the road trip that Nutz wrote about would come true. The wienermobile could be towed or just follow behind. I'd head to the great white north to visit Survey and then take bids. This trip would take 6 months or so. The building of my house would be left to my bestest!

What do you want with my millions. I'm guessing that all of you want your mortgage paid off. Or maybe just a week at the best resort in the Caribbean.

*hits head to return to reality*

I've come up with a solution to my money problems. My solution with buy me 2 years or so. One day at a time.

I'm so needing spring. I need to be in the garden working my flowers.

I might be moving back to my house. When a relationship starts to be so painful without any joy, well it's time to regroup.

I had to have my "Itty Bitty Kitty" put to sleep Sunday. Itty Bitty wasn't a cat that hung around people much. Plus I've been distracted. Sunday morning when I was putting food out she tried to walk. She couldn't. I went to her and gently stroked her. I wondered if she had been hit by a car. But she didn't mind when I picked her up and put her in the laundry room on the rug. She just laid there. I called an emergency vet service and took her in. Of course they wanted me to sign that I would cover any cost associated with her care (stated beginning price - $400.) I declined. Then I was asked if they could take a blood test. "Yes". The conclusion was that she was very, very sick. Her temperature was in the high 80's, she was severely dehydrated and anemic. Further tests could pinpoint the cause which might include Feline Aids, Feline Hepatitis, Liver/Kidney failure. Sadly I don't have the money to spend and the Vet said that after spending lots of money her problem could still be fatal. So I had her put to sleep. **sob** She was only 4 years old.

I don't have a picture here on my work 'puter. I took one of her lying on the carpet in the laundry room. Bye sweet kitty.

That's part of what is in my mind today! A small part!

Thursday's thoughts

2007-03-01T09:42:00.000-05:00

When Thursday rolls around I feel the week is over. That's because tomorrow I'll have a paycheck.

Do any of you ever feel that we build our lives around certain ideas, thoughts? We picture in our minds what life will be. Then a bump in the road changes what we thought would happen.

Aw, I'm no good today.

Rats in a maze - that's how I feel today.

Maybe I need a puppy!

Stolen from Arkie who stoled it from HD

2007-02-26T15:09:00.000-05:00

Create your own Friend Test here

That was easy

2007-02-20T08:13:00.000-05:00

I went to the surgeon's office yesterday. The usual routine, strip from waist up. Instead of a paper top they have a paper cape with no arm holes. I don't like this cape.

She asked how I felt after the biopsy, looked at the hole in my oobie. Then told me that the biopsy came back okay - follow up mammogram in 6 months.

I wasn't worried about the biopsy. Not being worried did worry me some.

I'm happy!

Next.

Just so you know

2007-02-16T13:18:00.000-05:00

I made good use of today. I read a book, played some Freecell and relieved some gas. Luckily no one came into my office unannounced.

And I decided that whatever happens will happen. If I decided to follow this course then these things will happen. If I decide on the other, other things will happen.

I have three choices for my income tax refund:

1. Get new carpet at the house
2. Pay bills
3. Go to Vegas for 3 days.

Of course I want to do #3. Even my son told me to do #2.

#1 would last longer, #2 might help my situation a wee bit, but #3 would be more fun!

Is this the new or old blogger

2007-02-15T07:55:00.000-05:00

I can't tell if I'm on new blogger.

I thought it made me switch yesterday. But today, when I went to respond to Swami I had to log in. I had to sign in the old way. Then I had to sign on the new way. What a pain.

What am I doing the rest of my life? (/end Barbra voice)

That's what I'm trying to decide.

It's Winter in Ohio

2007-02-14T07:51:00.000-05:00

Monday I told everyone that I was eagerly waiting on the coming snow storm.

It came, followed by freezing rain, and now more snow.

My only problem, in my S-10, is my driveway. I had to make 7 or so attempts to get into it last night. It took 4 attempts to get out of it today.

I am one of the few who came to work today.

I'm still enjoying the snow.

That's boredom for you.

Thanks

2007-02-11T14:22:00.000-05:00

Thanks for your responses to my last questions.

Now the test. It was as easy and painless as they said it would be. I got there, put on the robe. The girls were very sweet and supportive. I got onto the table, they squished my breast, took x-rays, repositioned, took more. Then I had to wait on the doctor. That was the hardest part - trying not to move. They kept talking to me to comfort me, I think. But I had to tell them I couldn't talk and concentrate on holding still. I'm pretty much a squarmer. OH, and they covered me up with my robe so I wasn't dangling in the air with my bare breast.

When the doctor came she gave me the local, said you'll feel some pressure (I know that is when they do the cut). Then she inserted some type of thingee (I could watch all this on the screen) and started roto-rooting. I could feel what she was doing, in an abstract way. Then I began to really feel it. It hurt, but not enough to make me squarm or anything. The pain was, I'm guessing, when they ripped tissue. It felt like a twirling rod which occasionally ripped my flesh. The I was done. She shot a metal clip in there for location in the future. I got up, they put steri-strips on, took a mammogram, I got dress and went out side. That's when the day went fast, steeply downhill.

*sigh*

Results a week from tomorrow!

Poll, Pull

2007-02-09T08:37:00.000-05:00

I need your input. Seriously, I need to know!

If you ask your significant other to accompany you to your biopsy do you:

1. Expect them to be there when you get out?
2. Would they be there when you get out?

Even if you visit later and are catching up, please respond. I'll be checking! I really need to know!

Slipping over the edge

2007-02-06T15:05:00.000-05:00

I may have slipped over the edge. I've been commenting to people that I've been feeling like I'm on the tip of a change. I felt I was going to go "good" or "bad". This morning I was sure I'd gone bad (or crazy). I woke up feeling like I was in a bubble. I talked to myself the whole time I was getting ready. And I danced. Sorta like an exotic dancer.

I'm glad my Dbf wasn't in the area.

I'm considering going back to the way I was before kids: more interested in sex than anything else; shallow; more often than not intoxicated; laughing and talking to anyone) or no one, damn the consequences.

I've had tight reins on my behavior since the birthing. And it didn't help my children that I was a model citizen. Cod, they'll be the death of me!

***runs rampid through life*** don't worry - be happy

It all Stops!

2007-02-01T08:14:00.000-05:00

Well, my cold has progressed to the sniffling, sneezing, coughing. I can't have the biopsy if I can't hold still.

So, I get to anticipate a little longer.

*sigh*

Edited to add: I can't get on Coco's, Boo's, or HD's blog. *whaaaaaawhaaaaa*

Edited again to add: I feel like someone stuck worms up my nose and this sealed them in with a tampon in each nostril.

I'd rather have "worms up my ass".

24 hours and counting

2007-01-30T08:22:00.000-05:00

I woke up yesterday and decided to wear a nicotine patch. Yesterday wasn't too bad. I'll admit to lighting a cigarette last night and taking a couple of puffs. I don't know why. I wasn't craving it. Then this morning I lit one while my car warmed up. I don't know why. I wasn't craving it.

On the way into work today it was spitting snow. I had my hood on and head down. So explain how a snow flake was sucked up my nose. Poor snow flake.

I know what I wanted to ask you non-smokers. I understand that the world smells pretty bad. I've been told that the subways in NYC smell like piss. I didn't smell it when I was there. I understand that sewers stink. I know that they steam, but I don't smell them. I am very sensitive to smells but when I smoke I don't smell anything but the worse smells. If I'm successful in not smoking how will I live in the world. I know that people at autopsies put Vicks under their noses. I like Vicks but what kind of idiot walks around with Vicks under their nose all the time. I fear that I will smoke as a defense against the smelling world.

I sat with my son at Urgent Care last night. He has an inter-ear infection. He smelled like oil. I told him. Will I be telling people that they stink? Probably. Another anti-social behavior for me to control.

I was trying to remember how many of you smoke. I know that Bravey does, Nutz does, Glowie is trying not to. I can't remember if Momma does. Or Woe. Or Boo. I'm pretty sure that Weltek, HD, Monsty, Coco, Bob don't. What about the rest of you? Puffy, Geggie, MTW, Arkie, Catt, Syren, CSTL, Jimbo (I think he's a no). Kimmah is around again. What about you?

Do we represent the norm?

The embarasment of it all

2007-01-27T10:39:00.000-05:00

The biopsy of my left breast is scheduled for next Thursday.

The instruction sheet came today and described it this way:

During the biopsy you will be lying on your stomach with your breast through an opening in the table. Your breast will be compressed as in a mammogram. You will be asked not to move during this time. Several x-rays of your breast will be taken to check proper positioning. A small area of your breast will be cleansed with an antiseptic solution. Your doctor will numb the biopsy area with Lidocaine. A small incision is then made in the breast. A needle is placed in your breast to remove tissue for the biopsy. A tiny stainless steel marker may be placed in the area where the biopsy was done.

Now, let's break this down. I will be lying on a table with a hole in it through which my breast will protrude. Get a picture folks.

Then they will press two hard surfaces on the breast. I'm assuming I'll now be 5 feet or so in the air.

I can not move.

Then (still not moving) I will be given lidocaine (like that stuff works) and punctured with a long probe.

Wow! I can't wait.

There will be no cell phones with cameras allowed in the room.

In the future, when walking down the street, no one will know the humiliation of this procedure BUT I WILL!

I know its for my health, but could they make it any more humiliating?

Men had to come up with these procedures. And I thought a vaginal ultrasound was bad.

I've been going thru one of my withdrawal moods. This one was particularly interesting in that I became paranoid with conspiracy theories. For instance, I was watching the travel channel and they were highlighting a place in Arkansas (I think) were people can search for diamonds. It's a large field that didn't look like it was near any mountains or hills. People go there and pick up dirt and sift through it. The travel commentator didn't find any. But there was this local who claims to have found hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of diamonds. I THINK HE WAS A PLANT PUT THERE TO INTICE US STUPID PEOPLE.

Then with all the evil out there I began to feel like I was the only one who didn't get it. I felt I was in denial and needed to get with the plan. Afterall, all these professed christians are stealing our money, killing our children and raping the environment. If this is god's plan then I need to get on board. I'm stupid to hang onto my morals when I'm the only one.

Has anyone been watching "Dirt" on FX. It stars Courtney Cox. Now that's alot of evil to wrap your mind around. I'm adicted to it like rubberneckers to a tragic car wreck. And I love Courtney Cox. She is my current girl crush (well after Bravey of course).

Actually I just think I need to ingest more alcohol! I was just at the grocery and walked down the wine aisle. I hate the taste but boxed wine may make me less paranoid!

Any spelling errors can be blamed on this stupid computer and it's inability to properly allow spell check to work (or the evil surrounding me!).

Walrus penis - bwahahaha

2007-01-11T14:18:00.000-05:00

Sorry, Bob, I'm still crying with laughter.

Today I found out that I can make a major mess out of a pre-packaged salad. Said salad is a Fresh Express Salsa! Ensalada Supreme. It has Iceberg & Romaine, Chunky Salsa, Blue & Yellow Corn Tortilla Strips, Mexican 4-cheese blend and to top it off Sour Cream Salsa Dressing.
Yummy!/end Rachel Ray voice. It's on my hands, my desk calendar, and some in my hair.

My son showed me around MySpace last night. The friends he showed me are fully clothed in their pictures, but the girls are provoctive and the boys all look like axe murders.

I wore my short boots today (well, because my other brown shoes were too light to match my top). These shoes are much narrower than my usual athletic shoes so my toes are crunched. Hense, the piggy that had "none" is cutting the piggy that had "roast beef". The piggy that cried all the way home is close to slicing the "none" piggy. For a person who has everything in her desk you'd thunk I had a nail clipper - but Noooo.

I visited my Cardiologist yesterday. Gawd, he is Dr. McDreamy in person. He told me that my heart is in perfect shape, it's ejection fraction is normal. From what I can tell that means it's pumping blood well. We talked about my smoking and he guaranteed me two things: he can keep my heart pumping well into my 80's and that dying of lung disease is nasty. There is a new pill which has had good results helping to quit. I think I'll try it, soon.

Today I had my ultrasound as a follow-up to my mamogram. She couldn't find what the mammogram and catscan did. I told her that was because my breast are so full. They are suggesting a biopsy and I see that doctor the 22nd. My body is just a maze of surgery scars.

The thread about sex and teens brought up a curiousity - the first time:

for girls - was it so absolutely painful as it was for me?

for boys - was it painful or just pure joy?

Zombie inspired letter

2007-01-03T12:53:00.000-05:00

Dear Me:

Awashed in the hustle and bustle of life we forget our accomplishments and only focus on our failures.

Please remember these small accomplishments made during this journey:

* You have overcome extreme shyness to: organize a class (of 300) reunion; given a presentation to a hall full of people; fought for equality on many fronts.
* You have overcome self-centeredness to: foster a troubled child and give continued support; give birth to and nurture two wonderful sons; find a new life partner; open your home over and again, despite the warnings, to many neglected people; be a understanding, loving companion to several friends; explore your shortcomings and understand them; work hard for equality.
* You have overcome a rather lack-luster early education effort to: finish the necessary college courses in order to pass all the qualifying tests at your company; excelled all all the jobs held at your company; find wonder and excitement at further learning.
* You have overcome depression to: support your children when needed; support your friends; continue enjoying the wonders of the world.

Although you are still shy, self-centered, and relatively uneducated you have proven that when needed all things can be overcome.

I will try to remember that you are my best friend and take better care of you from now on.

Sincerely,

Me

Busy, buzy, buzzzzzyyyyy

2006-12-19T14:59:00.000-05:00

Wow, I went from total boredom to chaotic. I like to be busy though, don't you. The more I have to do - the more I do. The less I have to do - I do nothing!

I went for my mammogram and they called me back for an "extra compression". I did that yesterday. It didn't hurt as much as I thought it would. It's a waiting game now.

Work is crazy. I am filling in for the lady in shipping. She's off the rest of the year! Lucky her. I'm enjoying it.

I realized yesterday that I love LOVE new challenges. I love learning new things. But once I master a task, breaking it down and putting it back together in the most efficient method I'm done with it. I should have been a process engineer!

Get ready for this . . . . . .

I joined a gym. It's called Lifestyle Fitness. Do you have these in your neck of the woods? I've been going almost every day. With the new membership I got three sessions with a trainer. Any more I have to pay. I'm a long way from being in shape, a long way from where I was after my heart attack and had finished rehab. But I'm working on it!

I miss reading your blogs and OT. I don't know anything that is happening.

Oh yes, I mailed my SS yesterday. A little late but it stays in the US and the post office didn't think it'd be a problem. Phew! I'm glad I got that done. A hard one this year!

Days fly by, no tragedies lately, It's All Good!

The tests are in

2006-12-04T12:23:00.000-05:00

I just returned from the Pulmonary doctor. It seems I have moderate lung disease. I currently have 75% of my lung capacity. He said that if I don't stop smoking I would need oxygen in 10 to 15 years. But there isn't any cancer!!!

The scan showed a 9 mm nodule in my left breast. I'm having a mammogram tomorrow anyway. We'll see what the nodule means then!

Geeeezzzzz Nutttzzzziiiieee!

2006-12-02T21:34:00.000-05:00

For Nutz - my TAR summary is up. That is the second hardest thing I've ever done (second to speech class). I agonized all week about it. They when I finally sat down and watched the tape I had to take notes because my laptop's screen doesn't work and it was upstairs. I just could bring myself to move the screen and laptop downstairs. Soooo, I took notes and had to transcribe them. Well I did volunteer but doubt if I will again.

The car payment has been found. My son (the forgetful one) picked it up off the table and mailed it. I'm just so used to them leaving it all to me.

I've had work to do and haven't been around much. I do read other's blogs.

My BF started a fight tonite. I'm so tired of it!

I'm anxious for my appointment with the Pulmonary doctor Monday. Then I have my mammogram and pap.

Ante called me dumb! But I got a message from a person I don't know well from the thread. That was good!

My SS giftee is an impossible person for me to buy for. I like the person. I just don't have any idea what to get this person! Why couldn't I get one of you? $10-20 is hard for me to stay with-in. I can't wait to get mine!!! I love presents.

I applaud you cookie exchangers. I probably won't make any this year. Nutz likes it so much she creamed!

My nose is cold.

I want to play today

2006-11-22T10:35:00.000-05:00

I'm feeling especially friendly today. Maybe it's the short work week.

My friend from Florida has been staying with us. That's been nice. She will join Dbf and I for Thanksgiving. My boys are celebrating with their dad.

I lost my son's car payment. I'm dedicating the rest of the morning to looking through my desk and associated clutter. If I don't find it I will be tearing up the living room tonight. I can not be trusted anymore. I'm getting more scatter-brained every day. I haven't been able to find my medical and travel cards for weeks.

I also drop things. I was just walking down the hall at work and I just dropped what I was carrying.

It's a 4 day weekend. Maybe I just need a couple days sleep!

#2

2006-11-09T10:04:00.000-05:00

Two posts today.

I'm feeling particularly optimistic today. Today I realized that I'm a pessimist.

I just wanted to say that I **LOVE** my Dbf. I often complain about him.

We often sit and watch movies and just giggle and laugh. He will say something to me that makes me giggle, I'll return the favor. I don't giggle with many people.

And he puts up with me.

*sigh*

The Santa Clara 49ers - what!

2006-11-09T08:12:00.000-05:00

The radio this morning upset me. They said the 49ers were going to leave SF. Carey, tell me this is a lie! WTF!

The ultimate catch-all

2006-11-07T15:27:00.000-05:00

After my afternoon smoke I stopped in the Gym to go to the bathroom. No, I haven't started excercising yet.

Just as I was sitting my necklace fell off. I tried to grab it but if fell in the toliet. I did grab it right before my stream started.

Does the 3 second rule apply?

Weekend fun - Monday drive

2006-11-06T10:38:00.000-05:00

Well, yesterday I recovered (as is re-gained custody) of my SW inspired couch. I sent it to my x's when my son and his friend (the one who died a couple of months ago) moved into my x's. This was so they could go to the basement and stay out of dad's hair. Well, when foster daughter and sons then moved to my house I let them take my sectional. So my great SW (Carey inspired) wall and family room had no seating. My son, a friend, my Dbf and I went over yesterday (x wasn't home). The thought went through my head that this is how anyone can clean someone's house out in broad daylight. No one even blinked as we removed the couch.

Anyway, my family room is looking good again. Just in time for my friend from Florida (the one who is taking care of her crazy aunt with the wicked cane) to visit me next weekend.

Saturday we went and had a delicious steak lunch and I fell asleep on the couch and slept until Sunday morning! I thought this was both good (must have been tired) and bad (a precious weekend day wasted).

On the way to work today I was behind a car with "Dinguss" on the license plate. I've seen this car many mornings but just today the license rang that distant bell. Reminded me of both Dingus and Gus!

I think I'll re-start exercising today. I admire Bob who seems to always exercise. We have treadmills and bicycles here at work, along with various weight machines. Then again, there is always tomorrow!

This is an update!

2006-11-01T12:51:00.000-05:00

It's Wednesday, November 1 and I'm back to work.

I'm feeling lazy - kinda tired from working. Everyone wants something from me today. You'd think I've been off work 2 1/2 weeks or something.

I'll be catching up on the party in SF this weekend and everyone else's happenings.

Thanks for checking!

Opppppsssss!

2006-10-19T23:36:00.000-04:00

Quick update:

I woke up Monday night with sharp chest pains.

I went to the EMR.

It wasn't my heart . but my lungs. I have pneumonia.

I got out yesterday (Wednesday).

That's why I was so tired!

Meme from HD

2006-10-16T09:48:00.000-04:00

1. If my life were a drinking game, everyone would do a shot when...
I click on a new blog or thread overthere.

2. The Rat Packer I most identify with is:
B) Sammy Davis Jr. - odd one out!

3. The first famous person I liked was:
Pernell Roberts on Bonanza

4. If I had to gain 30 pounds, I would eat:
Mexican food.

5. Choose one: A) The Rolling Stones; B) The Beatles
John, George and Ringo only.

6. The person I'm mistaken for most often is:
Uh, no one lately. I was once told I looked like Patty Hearst – when she was kidnapped. That started my fear of being arrested for a crime I hadn't committed!

7. Pick a Jessica: A) Jessica Alba; B) Jessica Biel; C) Jessica Simpson; D) Jessica Tandy

I sadly have no opinion other than I despise Jessica Simpson!

8. The worst advice I've ever received:
"Don’t sell those stocks. Keep them for the future (price went from $95/share to .35 – now staying at 2.35 - purchase price $11”

9. After a long day, I like to kick back with:
A) Martini; B) Cold Beer; C) Pinot Noir; or D) Chamomile Tea.

E) A Big Boy and a Coke!

10. The most underrated performer is:

Morgan Freeman

11. The thing I've wanted to buy but am just too embarrassed to purchase:

I'm embarrassed to purchase anything - at this time.

12. My porn name is: ___________________(childhood pet + street you grew up on)

Taffy Summit!

Private thoughts

2006-10-13T08:47:00.000-04:00

My little book of wisdom gave me this today:

"Keep your private thoughts private".

Too late for that!

Yesterday when I went out for lunch I saw this elderly lady in her wheelchair. She was in the road, in a lane, and when the light changed she crossed the busy street. Now that's desperate to "get out of the house".

It reminded me of an incident last week. I pulled into McD's. This McD's is at the busy intersection of a street that leads to an assisted living place. There was a lady in a wheel chair in the McD's parking lot, under a tree, sitting there looking at the sky. I so wanted to walk up to her and cheer her on (I assumed she had escaped for awhile).

I may sleep all weekend!

Diagnosis Needed - send funds also

2006-10-12T11:43:00.000-04:00

Please diagnose me:

I just took three days off work. Yes, three in a row for no reason – well there were reasons. I will list my symptoms and my guesses at a cause.

Symptoms:

I have been having some type of chest discomfort for two weeks. It’s not pain, per se, but it is uncomfortable. It’s more an ache.

I have been having headaches constantly. I almost never have headaches. They weren’t disabling, just achy. Throbby when I laid down.

My neck starting aching Friday night.

Sunday night I had a little bit of flu-bowel issues.

Monday morning I just couldn’t get up. I slept until 2:30 in the afternoon. I woke with an achy body – from knees up and elbows in – trunk aches with partial limbs. I slept all evening Monday, Monday night and got up Tuesday around 1 p.m. I was unable to sleep Tuesday night until really late. Wednesday I got up around 9 a.m. and stared at the TV.

No further fluid issues after Sunday night.

Did I mention that I didn’t even call work until Tuesday night. I just didn’t want to call! Couldn’t -??

Friday I was informed by a close friend that I look OLD!!

Don’t forget I’ve bought every ring that has crossed my sight and I’ve maxed out. I don't even want alot of them anymore.

My two bestest don’t want to live, my oldest son is lost, my youngest son is getting laid off (we were aware that his job might only last 3-6 months), my foster daughter has disappeared.

Diagnosis:

I’ve lost my mind permanently.

I lost my mind temporarily – bi-polar disorder. (I’ve always suspected this but everyone says I’m not bad enough for a diagnosis – HI HI HIGHS, low low lows)

I am being a stubborn heart patient and not heeding good advice to visit the local EMR.

Carey gave me the bird flu.

My lungs are shot and aching partially out my limbs.

I’m vain.

Subject Change

My “Life’s Little Treasure Book On Wisdom” written by H. Jackson Brown, Jr. called me to open it today.

“Get involved in your local government. Politics are too important to be left to the politicians”

JOKE

Heard on the radio this am on the way to work:

Two farmers are discussing politics. One farmer proclaims that he is netural, politically speaking. The other farmer replies, “Well then when you leave here put your car in netural and see how far you go. At least if’n you put your car in D you’ll go forward and if’n you put it in R you’ll go backward. Netural won’t get you anywhere!”

Baaaaawwwwwwaaaahhaa. Snnnnnooooorrrrffffllle! ROFLMAA!!!!!!!!

Me loves me some farmers!

LUNCH UPDATE - immediately when I got into my car Steve Perry was singing Separate Ways. If it would have been Lights I might have driven straight to the bay.

- - New diagnosis - -

Maybe I just need to come to SF with Arkie, or Kim, or someone!

ON THE BACK OF A SEMI - Hooter inspection 65' ahead - WTF!

Urrrrgggghhhhhh!

2006-10-04T10:41:00.000-04:00

Yesterday when I pulled into the parking lot at work I noticed my gas light. Sooo, after work I decided to go visit my son and get gas in that part of town (it's always cheaper). No, I didn't run out of gas (thank cod). Instead I made an astute observation. WHOEVER let car makers put the gas door on either side of the car needs BTHU (blown the hell up). I pulled into the gas station and saw the scrambling for gas pumps. I waited awhile for the confusion to die down, but I was 10 or so miles past the warning light and running out of time. I successfully pulled between two cars (who were at the first pump) and angled into the last pump. Another car was unsuccessful at this. As he was carefully going between the two cars and almost to the open pump someone backed into the pump he was aiming for. I heard a very loud "fuck". I'm old enough to remember when all gas tanks were filled from the driver's side. Then those damn Honda's appeared and now even American car makers put the gas lid on either side. It's a mess and I'm nominating automobile makers as the asshats of the day.

Then this morning I went to the doctor to get the results of my blood screen. Yep, my cholesterol is still out of whack but my triclycerides are way high. She's putting me on another drug, which combined with my current drug can cause some nasty things. She informed me, again, that I have bad jeans (only Jordache fit me properly) or genes. Well I know that I'm in between the 52 at which my mother died of a heart attack and 63 when my dad died of a heart attack. I have to call the cardiologist. Oh, and I'm due for a gyno exam.

But this trip this morning had a more irratating happenance. I went through McD for my breakfast (cholesterol be damned) and the drive through girl didn't give me a straw for my drink. Now I'm pretty good at eating and driving but it's impossible without a straw for my drink. Imbecile!

I forgot to talk to my grasshopper last night.

Mario Lopez's dance made me wet. He's sooooo hot!

Amazing things in life

2006-10-03T12:39:00.000-04:00

1. Healthy children - that's a #1 in my book. Although they are trying at times, they are healthy.
2. Good friends - I adore my bestests. My longest relationship is with my bestest who lives in Virginia. We've been close since 10th grade. She's my reality check. She has no qualms about telling me the truth - and I need that.
3. Good family - my brother and sisters are great people. They have too many trials and tribulations in life, but they are basically great human beings - loving and caring. My brother never has any money due to supporting his kids, one which the mother preferred him to disappear. He would never do that. My youngest sister is hilarious and smart. Her youngest has some form of autism which they need diagnosed but she doesn't have the money. Through it all she's still wonderful. My oldest sister has mellowed. She'll be 60 next year and she's the kinder than she's ever been.

Other things I've enjoyed the past couple of week:

I was catching up on my gardening which had been neglected since my surgery. On the side of the house we have a large, skinny evergreen tree (I don't know the names of evergreens). It contacted a bad case of 'bag worms'. As I was trimming out the damage I made friends with a rather awesome looking grasshopper. He was standing his ground on part of the tree as I trimmed. I talked to it throughout the process. He just turned his head from side to side and watched. A couple of days later when I went out to look at the tree he walked out on the tree and gave me a smile. I really think he did. I plan to check on him tonight. He'll die when the weather turns cold, won't he? I hate that.

As I was talking to him that first day I suddenly became aware that if the neighbors were watching they'd think I've gone batty (I have), what with caring on a conversation with a tree. I talked to that grasshopper like I do my cats. You animal people do talk to your pets like children, don't you? I'll never forget seeing my dad talking to our itty bitty dog, in that voice we use with little children. People who talk to animals like that are the kind souls.

A lady at work was talking about canning vegetables. Do any of you do this? I think this is a great thing to do. My mother canned for some time until she started freezing vegetables. I remember watching her (no I didn't really help - I'm not domesticated) boil corn on the cob, cutting it off, putting it into tupperware like containers, and freezing it. I should take up a domestic hobby like this. Maybe making jelly, or sausa, or something.

Am I the only one who loves Cao Boi's eyes and expressions?

Four for the money, Five alive, and Six the hicks

2006-09-29T10:27:00.000-04:00

4. Money - Somewhere along this journey I decided that if I WANT it I'll buy it. Arkie was talking about her books. I used to buy books and in my OCD I would actually use a sticky, clear book cover to keep them nice looking. Then I ran out of places to keep the books. Then I realized that I would never read them again. Sooooo, I turned to Longenbarger baskets. These were destroyed in my home fire (and were a good investment in that the insurance money for them financed a trip to Cancun for me and the boys). Then it was coats - I stopped after 6. Then shoes - I have 25 or so pairs. Then the sickness of gemstone jewelry. I have taken the advice of a smart poster and stopped buying from QVC. I rarely buy from Jewelry TV but can't resist seeing what is on Bidz. After I get them, I don't even like some of them!!

5. I'm so happy with the results of my surgery. Every day I smile because I can walk without pain. My thigh aches a little when it rains, but other than that I'm like new. Well, except for the heart issues. My cholesterol is high. I had a fasting blood draw yesterday and am anxiously waiting for the results.

6. I have become acquainted with people the likes of which I've never known. I think I have told you that my son's know people in prison. Not just county for drunk driving and small things. This is prison. My youngest best friend has been in prison for, I think two years. He gets out in January. I'm dreading that day. He's in for aggravated burglary, an act that my youngest was along with him to witness. My son, being a juvenile at the time, and due to my support in hiring a good lawyer didn't get a felony charge and with the exception of the time he spent in juvie, 2 weeks if I remember right, and his house arrest came out okay. He wasn't an active participant, but he was there. My oldest has a close friend in another prison for aggravated burglary. My oldest wasn't anywhere around this guy during the commission of the crime. He also gets out in January. Another x-close friend, now more an acquaintance, may be charged with manslaughter for providing drugs to his uncle. The drugs killed the uncle (not that he wasn't walking death before).

Last night my oldest and some of his friends came up to visit and get the last pieces of my sectional. These friends are polite, friendly, entertaining, and seem NORMAL. But both of them have been in jail.

In my southern Ohio upbringing I guess we would call these people white trash.

My foster-daughter went back with the x. She doesn't love him. She doesn't even like him. He pushed her into a corner and she caved. Using a child as a weapon is so cruel. And he is, as his sergeant said, "an unpaid volunteer" to a local police department. He has gone through the academy and is working special duty (read grocery store cop) at this time. He is paid through the grocery store. He is trying to become a full-time police officer. And he has no morals. He has no sense of right or wrong. He is violent. He is bi-polar. She has a plan to escape, one that I was not told exactly but I know what it is. It is something that NO ONE I've ever known would devise.

These things are always in my head and I want them out!

This was mostly a downer post. The next one will be on the amazing things in life. The things that make you smile. The things that make you jump out of bed every morning.

Oh, and I'm planning a March - April trip to Puerto Rico. Add San Juan to my list of capitals visited!!! And I hope we'll have a late summer one also, either New England or California coastal!!

ETC. (eccetra, eccentric, extra careful)

2006-09-27T13:45:00.000-04:00

I've been neglecting blogger with all the TV I'm watching. And all the Survivor games. I've made notes of 12 things to blog about - here's 3.

TV Schedule

I was so lost with all the new TV shows debuting. And since we have shitty cable channel 6 is now 11, channel 4 is now 13, etc. I was so confused. So yesterday I opened excel and started a spreadsheet with the days of the week down the column on the left with 8,9,10. Across the top I put ABC, CBS, NBC, FOX, OTHER. Then I got on all the websites and made a schedule. (How very compulsive of me right!). I've not watched survivor as a rule, but after reading over there that it is the BEST reality show I'm trying it. And, of course, I have to play every.last.game. (Those have individual spreadsheets also). It's just too time consuming.

Oh, I was talking about my TV schedule. Monday's are ok, with the Class (I loved the debut), How I Met Mother (so so), 2 1/2 Men (so so and getting old), and The Adventures of the new Christine (I love it). Then Studio 60 conflicts with What About Brian.

Tuesdays are dull but I watch Dancing with the Stars for now - also my first whole season. I watched the debut of Help Me Help You with Ted Danson last night. I think it will be a good show.

Wednesday's are totally not for me.

Thursdays - Thursdays - WTF. At 8: Survivor (see above), Earl (I love that show), and Ugly Betty (I'm looking forward to seeing if the hype is better than the show). What will I do? Then my 'Can't Miss TV' with Grey's at 9. Why or why do the networks put all the best shows against each other. Can't they share, say CBS get's Monday's, ABC get's Tuesdays, etc. My head will explode on Thursday's.

Friday - I like Ghost Whiperer but it's getting old. Men in Trees have been pretty good so far.

Saturday - I'm not sure there's anything worth watching which is good because Dbf will be home starting next week. Overtime at work will be ending until later in the year.

Sunday - 8 TAR, 9 Desperate Housewives, 10 Brothers and Sisters. I think Brothers and Sisters will be a great show. But why did they kill off one of my fav tv stars in the first episode. Sunday is my perfect night, with only one show per hour!

Remember the day when a movie star wouldn't evah, evah be on a TV series. That has changed. Let's name the times: Martin Sheen, Charlie Sheen, Keifer Sutherland, Sally Field.

Banned OTers

Do people who are banned from OT just get a new name? Has it happened often that they come back? How many do you know of? Who are they? Would you come back?

Quarters

Anyone else start the insanity of collecting the state quarters? When I start collecting something I can't stop. If any of you need any, let us know here. Puffy and I are doing an exchange and I've started saving some others just in case. If Nutz can keep one car running she will get us her list also. I was in Canada the year they released their new quarters. I bought them ALL at the same time, in a pretty collector thingy. I don't know why I bought them but it was great to get them all at once instead of over 10 years.

What else have you collected? Silly stuff like: McDonald toys? My neighbor used to make fun of me because if I got one toy in a collection I had to go back and get the rest. You can't have only one transformer in a series, you need all 6. I have two year's of Teeny Beenie baby's in a drawer. Why do I have them? What will I do with them? Will anyone want to buy them? Will I be able to part with these if someone would buy them?

Topics 4 thru 6 soon.

And suddenly it's fall

2006-09-06T09:08:00.000-04:00

Yesterday, the day after Labor Day I wore WHITE shoes and shorts. The fashion police can KMA. While I'm loving the cool evenings I'm beginning to dread the next 6 months. It snows in Ohio folks and I have little patience with snow these days.

What else is happening?

My foster daughter and her 2 yr old spent the weekend at my house. Two year olds can be quite irritating. He's into the whine for what I want. And mom gives in to him and wonders why he whines. We did get him to ask for what he wanted at times but mostly he let out a blood curling screech. And she lets him walk around with food and drink constantly. My coffee table was smeared with food stuff. My cats hid under the bed all weekend.

I bought my Dbf a digital camera as a very, very late father's day present (I was in the hospital on father's day). The camera is much better than mine in that it has a higher resolution, is smaller, and is easier to use. I like that it is small and can be carried around easily. We'll probably use it on vacations.

My laptop is so messed up. The screen stopped working a month ago and we have to hook it up to a monitor. My CD/DVD burner doesn't work either. So we bought an external 60Gig drive to put all my pictures and music on. And suddenly I only have 3% available memory. We are going to reformat the original hard drive. We are hoping that the CD/DVD will work. The monitor probably won't. An estimate on fixing the monitor is in the 300.00 range. Yikes. And it could take up to 3 weeks.

My children continue to stress and frustrate me.

My two bestest friends (one in Florida and one in Virginia) are so depressed. I hate talking to them some days because they bring me down. And I'm not the most giggle-ish person either. Both want to die, both hate their lives, both are homeless to an extent and without money. *sigh* I can offer bedrooms in both of my houses but I'm financially unable to help. Neither want to relocate to my house(s). Oh well, you do what you can.

At breakfast Monday I asked Dbf when does he wants to go to the Caribbean. I get points from my time share in January. Then I don't get any more until 2009. I hope to dump it by then. Anyway, we are talking about March/April. When is spring break next year? I want to avoid spring break! Also, I'm hoping that we can do a California/Oregon coast vacation. If we can, I'll get to meet some awesome peeps!!!

That's about all I have today. Oh yes, do you West coast peeps have any of the new quarters. We aren't getting the 2006 ones here. I'm collecting the Denver mint and so far have 0. If you can help, let me know!

Maybe . . . . Maybe not!

2006-08-28T09:12:00.000-04:00

I've enjoyed catching up on the blogs. I spend most of my time right now on the BB forums. Anything to distract me from reality.

Being back to work is good and bad. Bad in that I'm so bored. I could be doing something constructive at home. Good in that I'm keeping a better schedule. Maybe I'll enroll in some classes Winter quarter. I enjoy classes because I enjoy being focused. I've been working on a measly Associates degree since 1983. Life aways interupts, the last time when I broke my hip two years ago.

Speaking of injury/illness - I've be on disability the last three summers. At the end of the disabiities I get to enjoy and try out retirement abeit with more money coming in weekly. I think I would enjoy working a job with less hours. My gardens have suffered from these injuries/illnesses. I start in the spring and when I'm disabled they go to weeds. I went out this weekend to work on the front flower bed. Dbf planted mint in the flower bed before I was around. Mint is an invasive weed. He just wanted a simple ground cover. I guess it would be useful for this except that it takes over the entire bed with feeder roots. The mint smell is pleasant to some but nauseating to me in large quantities. Plus it doesn't look like the manicured flower bed I want. I've been trying for two summers to rid the bed of this weed! So far no luck. The roots are everywhere. Saturday I managed to rid about 1/5 of the bed from mint. In the process I broke a nail (sob) and got a huge blister on my palm. The skin over the blister came off about the same time I noticed it. Plain water sends pain throughout my hand. Bandaids don't stick to palms. Should I try Liquid Bandaid or just suffer until the raw skin is covered with new, harder skin?

As I said I enjoyed read the blogs I've been able to read. Arkies' modern convenience entry got me thinking of the "olden" days in a different way. I live in Central Ohio, grew up in Southern Ohio Southern Ohio has the foothills of Kentucky and West Virginia. In the "olden" days Ohio was enhabited by the Shawnee tribe. About 15 years ago a co-worker got me interested in Native American history. I've read numerous books on tribes, especially the Shawnee. When I'm driving from here to my birthplace my mind always goes to the Shawnee. I wonder what a day in their life was really like. I imagine the area completly forrested. I wonder how they didn't get lost on their travels. I wonder what it would look like then and how many bears there were. I wonder about their misery when the "white man" started coming down the Ohio in streams and ruining their common hunting grounds (with the Cherokee) in Kentucky. Kentucky wasn't inhabited on a permanet basis by any tribe. It was used as a hunting ground for their food. It was teaming with Buffalo, bear, deer. It was also full of salt deposits used in preserving food.

Funny story about my son and his acceptance of my study of the Shawnee. He so wanted to be related to Tecumseh. He was 6 at the time. The best I could tell him was that Tecumseh and the Shawnee probably killed some of my realtives who came from Pennsylvania and other states to Kentucky during that time. My grandparents moved to Ohio from Kentucky in the 1880's.

Who are we to decided that indigenious populations are missing the good life? The more "stuff" I gather the less happy I sometimes think I am. The less I have to put in a "good" day's work the less healthy I am.

Sure modern medicine has enable me to be alive right now. And I am thankful for that and the suffering I've not had to bear. So the modern convenience I most appreciate is medicine.

I think we would be better off with a little of the "indigenous" lifestyle. I'm so disheartened with the world today - the violence; the nastiness; the right wing I'm so better, more moral, than you ness.

Lighter side: 99 out of 100 observers agree - I walk like a normal person!!! Woo Hoo. And 80 of the 100 think I could pass for 10 years younger than I am. But then 40 is the new 50.

Happy birthday to all the June, July, and August birthday peeps! Happy beautiful baby to CSTL and Syren!! Happy vacation to all the peeps who had a recent vacation! Happy peep meet to the Niagara folks!

To the rest of you - happy Labor Day!

As we move on

2006-08-10T09:58:00.000-04:00

The funeral is over. His sister, who lives in Dallas and is only 19, rushed home. She paid for 100% of the funeral. A very interesting person. My son's are doing as well as can be expected. The older one, who had to be awashed in pain at the funeral and was constantly touching him, seems to be doing the best. He feels that the funeral was closure. The youngest is still struggling. He wouldn't go close to the casket, etc. He's very angry right now.

I went to the doctor yesterday. All is going exceptionaly well. I'm scheduled to return to work on the 21st. Part of me is ready, part of me doesn't ever want to go back to work. When I get back to work I will be catching up on all the blogs as I will be confined to a computer.

Dbf's mother is in the hospital. His father has been ill also. This is the next part of reality that we will focus on.

I'm beginning to plan my '07 vacation to occupy my mind on a positive. I'm thinking we have to go to the Carribean. I want a relaxing, beautiful time. I would also like a peep meet.

I most likely won't be updating until the 21st. Peace, love and joy!

Sob!

2006-08-01T15:00:00.000-04:00

I don't know how to title this. I wish I had Supes writing skills to properly tell this story.

For now, a short summary. I'm too emotional to write it all down yet.

A couple of weeks ago on OT there was a discussion about suicide. I read the entire thread with my, then, views. Now it has hit close to home.

The best friend, with no warning, hung himself in our huge Maple tree early Sunday morning. I got the call around 7:15 a.m. from foster-daughter. The police and fire department woke her up banging on the door. We sped down there, I called my x who lives in the neighborhood. He went right over. We got there 25 minutes or so later. My oldest was still asleep and we didn't want to wake him yet.

The police left the boy in the tree, covered up after some time, for 3-4 hours. Investigation, but wtf? By the time we found his father they had laid him in the yard with a sheet. Then we woke up my oldest who, to understate, went biserk. We all: x, father and father's best friend, foster daughter and son, me and Dbf, youngest and oldest son and others who stopped by after hearing the news were out side until 2:00 pm.

I know there is no logical explanation. My sons and his friends know this. But I still try to solve it. They still try to solve it. We have talked about only if, only if. We all have only ifs. We know, again logically, that there is no one "only if".

This act leaves devestation everywhere. It leaves no logic. No one reason.

My x and I try to keep an eye on the boys and fD at all times. They seem to be grieving in the ways one should. But if I'm struggling this much I know they are 100xs more lost.

Just send good thoughts to his family and friends.

I'll update later after the viewing Thursday, or maybe not until next week.

Good friend who's reading this - call me when you can. I hope that all is well with your dad!

It's Week 3 in the Lasann House

2006-07-26T17:37:00.000-04:00

Week three and all are still alive. Son is the house cleaner and the responsible baby watcher. Best friend is parting elsewhere and is "calling everyone out" if they lie about him or anything. Dear foster daughter's life is crazy and she is in denial. Her x hit her the other night (in a set up created by a mutual friend of theirs) and she finally pressed charges. X is a police person and has promised to kill her and the baby if she ever called the cops.

I'm still staying there on my Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday nights to watch the kid. He's the reason for all of this but I don't have good feelings about his future.

I'm tired - I came home and slept all day. The leg is getting better and I can walk without the crutch but it still hurts alittle if I do. It doesn't hurt at all with the crutch.

Dbf is being soooo nice! We had a great weekend, calm and peaceful.

Work is looming - don't know if I'll be off two more weeks or maybe more.

I'm totally consumed with this arrangement - it keeps me busy.

Later!

It's the end of July already

2006-07-22T11:39:00.000-04:00

Where has the time gone. Okay, I spent two/three weeks in pain killer fog. But, WTF, it's almost August and I haven't done any good work on my gardens. I don't have a tan. I haven't been in a swimming pool.

My next doctor's appointment is August 8. It will be decided then whether I return to work immediately or not for some time. I'm doing well, considering, and honestly could return to work. I still have pain in my thigh. But I could one crutch myself into my office and sit on OT all day. I have a hard time lying, so I'm working on a little white one about how I'm better but not yet ready to return to work yet.

Update on personal stuff: My foster daughter and her son. my oldest son, and his tag long friend moved into my house. My foster daughter is paying me $500/month. The two boys are paying me $200/month each. It was my idea that the boys will live in the basement and Brandy could have the top of the house. Everyone is happy - right?!?! Well no, Brandy isn't and I understand her points. As she says she has never had control over her environment. She lived with an abusive, drug addicted mother and her many boyfriends, then in various foster homes and institutions, then with an abusive boyfriend. She is trying very hard to earn money and to have control over her life.

Side story about her mother - Brandy had moved into an apartment a couple of months ago. Her mother was out of jail and crashing at her daughter's apartment. One night, as Brandy was getting ready for work her mother took her 21 month son to the bathroom for a bath. Mother closed the door. Brandy wondered why and opened the door and her mother was smoking crack, in a closed small bathroom with her son. Brandy went totally insane and was beating her mother and a neighbor pulled her off. She moved back in with abusive boyfriend (and father of her son). She called me two weeks later and wanted to move in. Her mother is 36, has 5 kids, and has lost custody of all of them.

Anyway, back to my house. I created this blended household and now she wants the boys out. I want the tag-along friend out (a story for another day). Brandy says she will take better care of the house. My son says that I might call her my daughter but he IS my son. I create more problems for myself. I told them Thursday that altho I caused this problem they could fight it out 'cause I'm not choosing.

I volunteered to watch her son Monday - Wednesday nights. So I was down there this week watching the kid. He is a very good kid. I enjoyed it. If I was up here with Dbf at work I'd just be ordering jewelry online - ha! I have no computer down there. My son did get cable so I can watch TV.

Dbf and I have reconciled our differences once again. I just pray that he doesn't betray my trust again!!

Syren is close the having the baby, BB is on although my girl is gone, and I haven't yet caught up on blogs or OT. I did get the wonderful sigpic from Tribe! I'm watching C-Span2 Book TV about black journalism. Dick Gregory is on. He must be 80+. I find these programs educational. Does anyone else?

The monitor on my laptop went black so I'm hooked up on a flat screen monitor that my Dbf has. Also my CD/DVD drive won't work. WTF. It's noon on Saturday.

Later . .

Update - woo hoo

2006-07-14T10:14:00.000-04:00

I've been absent from the blogs for awhile. I hate it when all I can write is whinning. I haven't been enjoying myself much. But,

My leg is progressing well. I am on one crutch. I can get around well. The muscles in my legs are completely gone. I need to be more diligent about exercising them 3x a day. I think that I'm so tired of pain that I don't exercise because it causes sore muscles. But that is what the pain pills are for. FTR I don't take the pain pills more than twice a week. I'm so afraid of taking too many.

Personal - I made the decision to move. Being me I couldn't hide my displeasure. Dbf, since I told him, has been the perfect mate. I realize that this is a pattern but he seems to want to work at our issues. I'm a very mixed up person on that level. My best friend, who visited for surgery, absolutely doesn't like him. When we talk I know that all the points she makes are legit but for some reason I still think this relationship can work.

My foster daughter, the one who left me high and dry when renting my house, is back in my house. She is without crazy boyfriend and promises to pay me weekly to rent. My oldest son is also living in the basement and promising to pay weekly. We'll see today. The foster daughter gave me $250 Wednesday. I had planned to move back in and help her with her son.

I'm so conflicted as to what I should do.

Enough on me.

The peep meet in Niagara sounds so fun. I wish I could have attending. I need to lighten up!

I'm off to catch up on everyone's blog.

Until then . . .

Jewelry, Life

2006-06-28T11:33:00.000-04:00

In a previous post I mentioned that I was no longer a TV shopping virgin. I ordered some (a few isn't honest, some hopefully covers it) jewelry. The following three items have shipped (I took a picture from QVC and added the cost in case of future theft) and I'm anxiously waiting on them. I believe I will get them today. The top ring and necklace are Rose Blush Garnets, the bottom ring a black pearl.

As I mentioned before I'm financially challenged. I have amassed a debt that is almost impossible to pay. But I'm still buying. This jewelry thing is a compulsion since the nasty step-daughter stole all my jewelry. My sister informed me that QVC will take anything back if I return it. The smart thing would be to return it. But will I? Should I?

Dbf is working 14 hours a day until Saturday. Then he will probably be here all day. We have talked very little in the past 2weeks +. I am so un-fake that I can't fake what I'm feeling, the fact that I've decided to move. It won't be pleasant. My sister is afraid for me. I don't think it will be anything other than nasty words which I've decided not to engage in. It's a fact. I don't want to say things in the heat of the moment. I will be calm.

A fellow smoker at work has been asking Dbf about me, concerned with how I'm doing. The fact that this is a man is a topic of contention with Dbf. Yesterday he gave Dbf a puzzle book for me. It's a SUKOKU book! I've not tried this new puzzle and am excited to try. I usually do Logic Problems. Anyway, Dbf is "way put out" about this. He inferred with his words that there is something going on between us. He simply doesn't understand friendship and compassion. I never talk to this man except on smoke breaks. Last year he had rotator cup surgery on his shoulder. I just think he remembers the isolation and pain and frustration of being temporarily disabled. He was being kind.

Oh, the View is on and Star is missing! Is she leaving immediately? One can hope. I like Joy's hair. It looks to hard to keep up though. I'm thinking of cutting my hair again. I don't know. My one aunt (Arizona) has a short cute cut. My other has a long pony tail. I think both look fabulous.

Oh, quiz - my son asked me if he can drive my truck to Kentucky this weekend. He is talking a friend to visit his son. He hit a deer in his car last week. This Neon looks like it can't possibly be driven. There is a missing headlight (because of the deer), a broken tail light, various dents. He is working hard (at my work place) and saving money - he has $4,500 so far. He is going to get a newer, nicer car soon. I know that he will go to Kentucky either way. I prefer him to be safe. The funny thing is that the truck isn't out of the shop yet from the accident. I expect to get it back tomorrow or Friday. What would you do? Oh I just remembered, the guy I mentioned above, when we were talking about the accident in my truck said "If your son wasn't in your truck he could have been hurt badly, or worse". He is so right since he was hit from behind and pushed into the car in front. In his little car he would probably have been injured badly.

Each day gets easier.

My walker and my flowers

2006-06-26T13:29:00.000-04:00

My walker. This is the one thing I couldn't live without. Notice on the left. That is a reacher. My sister bought it for me because I'm not supposed to bend over. For 12 weeks there is a danger of dislocating my hip.

On the right is my grocery bag. That is how I get my phone, notepad, cigarettes, etc from room to room.

I actually went outside a couple of days ago to take pictures of my flowers. Here's the small garden in the front. The big green bush in the front was purple in the spring. The daylilly's bloom is huge.

I'm not in the blaming mood anymore - see yesterday's post. So I just want to say HI to everyone. I haven't had a pain pill since midnight, 14 hours. The pain isn't so bad anymore, the butt is no longer discolored. Heal *puts hand on own forehead* heal.

What to do with 24/7 and Lightsy is my topic

2006-06-25T10:28:00.000-04:00

What does one do with 24/7 and the inability to navigate. When the pain pills wear off I just concentrated on relief. When the pills are working I watched TV, spent time thinking about my current life situation.

TV - we don't have digital so the only guide is the one that you have to watch from channel 2 to channel 99. On a good day I can't remember more than one number for that leghth of time, now my memory in my haze. So I just changed channels and watched the first thing that caught my attention. It didn't take long to get hooked on morning TV beginning with the Today Show, Kelly and Regis, The View. Yes Carey I have suffered through Star - gawd she's awful. I can't wait until Rosie joins. I love Rosie. But I will be back to work by then. THEN the soaps come on and I no longer watch them so I napped. I was every fearful that I would sleep past 4 when Ellen comes on. I love Ellen - but this week's shows were all reruns.

My cat has been my constant companion. He sleeps with me 22/7 - a cat needs to eat.

Enough about this - - - -

Lightsy's latest post 'caused me to blame her today. I will blame her for bringing me back to reality. My life is flowers and roses compared to the friends she blogged about. My heart is sad for her and her friends. I need this *slap across the face* ocassionaly to bring me out of a funk. *smooches* and {{{hugs}}} to Lightsy and the people she knows that are hurting!!!! Thanks for sharing and helping me *snap out of it*.

It's Sunday and the parade is today in SF (i think). A shout out to the California peeps who are attending and their guests!!!!!

I can't wait to get the hell out of the house. About 2 weeks and I will be having short ventures out.

Blaming HD and WARNING - picture of butt check

2006-06-24T13:22:00.000-04:00

HD was the first peep I felt a connection to over there. He is intelligent, muti-faceted, and HOT!!! I followed him over here. His post yesterday made me shed actual tears. Why does such a wonderful person have trouble in love?????? So I'm blaming him for my tears yesterday.

Now, please be careful because the following is an actual picture of my ass, cut down so that it doesn't appear to be an ass. My nurse said it looked really good as some people's ass turns black. Mine, went straight to purple.

And, I'm so lonely!! Dbf or soon to be Xbf hasn't spent more than 5 minutes a day with me. My sister has been great and helpful. My youngest son has come over when we can but he has this new job and they are working ot and he needs the $ in case of a layoff at work.

I ordered something from QVC today. Lost my virginity, I did. Of course it was jewlery, my new passion. A black pearl ring, a muti-stoned ring, a rose-garnet ring and necklace.

Glow, Jen, Carey, maybe MM and MTW (as you all know) are enjoying the SF celebrations this weekend. I'm gellus. I think all of us should go out there next year for the celebration. What a hoot! Peep meet extravaganza!!!!! An if our next peep meet is during Gay Pride week we don't have to worry about certain right-wing, wrong-thinking people attending. Seriously, let's make reservations asap!!

With cymbals clanging, bells ringing

here is my ass
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Bionic updated, A Changed View of Life, and a Poll

2006-06-23T15:33:00.000-04:00

The metal hip is doing better. The black/blue ass check is now light yellow/green. The incision looks less like an angry dog ripped me open and more like some crazed maniac with a dull knife attached. I can go 7 hours between Percocets and now have Loritab. Of course I will keep all 6 Percocets for an emergency later.

I've decided that my failures in life are based on my "taking responsibility for my actions" way of life. I am immediately changing to "it's XYZ's fault". You see most of the people in my life play the blame game. They seem to have no regrets. spend zero amount of time with introspection, have an unquenchable need to tell everyone who caused their problem, and therefore garner much sympathy. Here goes:

This is Nutz's fault. I hobbled out of my caged-in room and pulled some TGIF's potato skins out of the freezer, turned on the oven, placed them in and set the timer. I told myself to listen closely for the buzzer. I then glided into the LR to catch up on a couple blogs. Well, while trying to get Nutz's link to work to see what Asshat we have over there and taking notes of all her entries so that I could attempt to make an intelligent/witty comment on her latest post - yep, you got it I burned my lunch! Shit damn.

Tune in tomorrow for the next one of you who is ruining my life.

The poll concerns my hip. I actually took a picture of my incision and bruised butt. Should I post theses pictures or should I just use big girl words to explain?

And GO NAKOMIS!!!!! I love you girl and am only voting for you!

Bionic Woman

2006-06-15T13:45:00.000-04:00

I'm home. That's all for today!

Pics

2006-06-09T17:26:00.000-04:00

Blogger is up! Woo Hoo

This is the view from our patio. I liked the reflection on the water!

An adobe house in NM.

Monument Valley - it's very purdy!

The waterfall we walked up to just south of Wolf's pass in Colorado.

I'd never seen a saguaro cactus. They were blooming!

More later.

Surgery Monday - yikes!

There are amazing sites to be seen

2006-06-01T08:58:00.000-04:00

As promised down there - it's Sunday and we are leaving Phoenix to drive to SW Colorado. I'm praying that Dbf won't rant for a week.

As we approach NE Arizona, Monument Valley spreads out before us. We decide immediately to check it out now and not later. We drive into the valley and are mesmerized by the beauty. I'd post pics but Dbf hasn't made the CD to transfer to my 'puter. We drive to every available corner and take massive amounts of pics. (Somewhere before this I buy a nice turquoise necklace and ring from, I believe, Chief Yellowhorse's place)

We leave Monument Valley in search of my timeshare location. But before we get far there is a casino. I just want to go to sleep but Dbf wants to stop. By the way, there is no cell phone reception in most of these places. We stop at the Ute Mountain Casino to call and tell the timeshare we will be a late-check in. Instructions gathered we gamble. And lose. We arrive at the timeshare at approximately 2:30 a.m. We left Phoenix at 10 a.m. I've very tired. (Carey your estimation failed, not from lack of skill but from total exhaustion of the subjects involved. Even he was too tired for sex!)

Monday morning arrives with sunny skies. We are hungry and don't have a clue where to go to get grub. Consulting the map for ideas for day trips we decided to take it easy during the day: eat and rest. We find another casino about 45 minutes sw of Pagosa Springs. After resting we go gamble again. I do fairly well, leaving with $60 extra bucks. Not the thousands I was hoping for because, you see, I have two vehicles and neither is now worth a damn!

Tuesday we drive westward into Colorado, through Wolf's Creek Pass. There is snow on the ground. It's odd to be around snow but it not be cold. We find a waterfall, walk up to it, take mountains of pics. We try to find a mountain dirt road to climb (in the car) so we can get higher. We find one, it's partial covered with snow shortly after beginning our trek. Then we encountered a fallen tree. Not to be dissuaded, Dbf knocks the branches off the tree and we limbo under the tree with the car. We climb, encountering snow occasionally and it is fun for me to try to drive through it without tumbling into the canyon on my left. Unfortunately we then encounter too much snow/slush for the vehicle to transverse. We get semi-stuck. There happened to be a guard rail at this location. I wonder why?!?!?. After using rocks for traction we manage to turn around and our forest/mountain trek is over. We eat, shop (I bought an amazing ring), go back to the hotel to get ready for our adventure on Wednesday.

Wednesday morning comes early - 6:00 a.m. We stumble out of bed, get ready and drive 60 miles on a two-lane curvy road to Durango (where I thought we were staying but it turned out to be in Pagosa Springs 60 miles East). Here we board the Durango Silverton train which traverses through the forest, over bridges with canyons below. It is a steam engine and we are in a railroad car that is open on the sides but covered with a glass top. It is a beautiful, relaxing trip to Silverton that takes 3 hours. At Silverton, an old mining town, there are two things to do for the 2 hours we are there: shop and eat. We do both. I take pictures of the town which has attempted to look like it did when servicing the mining industry. It did have dirt streets. The trip down is boring as we have already seen the sites. We return to Durango at 6 p.m. Another day gone and the end is near. yikes I'm not ready for the reality of real life!

Thursday I decide that Pagosa Springs is just too isolated for day trips. I gingerly approach Dbf about leaving early and staying somewhere else Friday and Saturday nights. We agrees enthusiastically. PHew! I consult maps and decide that I want to go to Santa Fe Friday and since Albuquerque is only 55 miles south of Santa Fe that we should stay in Albuquerque. Wanting to split the return to Phoenix up I think we should stay 1/2 between Albuquerque and Phoenix. Dbf is more interesting in driving all the way to Phoenix Saturday. It's fine with me but doesn't allow as much Native reservation touring as I wanted. We made one BIG mistake in this planning session. We decide to return to the casino, the second one Ute Sky Casino. There, Thursday night, in a desperate attempt to win some much needed cash we lose. And we lose alot.

*side note* I do like to gamble. The thrill of winning is addicting. No one in my life, until now, shared my sickness. Now Dbf is worse than me. My luck is 99% at roulette. Indian casinos we've visited don't have roulette. They have tables with Blackjack and poker. The blackjack minimum is $3 and the maximum is $5. It would take an extremely long winning streak to gain even $100. I, of course, lose $40. I've never been lucky at slots. I can sometimes play for a couple of hours on a small investment, winning some, losing more. They have a bank of $1 machines that some people are dinging away at. One person won $900, another $650, another $300 twice. These machines are very popular. While I'm playing blackjack Dbf gets an open machine. People are still winning. He is losing. Two machines he left, the next person wins $350 and $500. SHIT! I know this isn't our day but we are stubborn people. I have moderate short-term success at the $1 slots but, overall, we lost our asses.

Life is interesting that what we want (me a fellow gambler) turns out to be what we don't want. I want to leave, he's still got the bug and hope springs eternal.**

Friday we leave and trek to Santa Fe. On the way I want to visit some Pueblo's. We find one and watch a mini Pow-Wow with children dancing all decked out in colorful costumes. Dbf is tiring of driving so we head to Santa Fe. We find a free parking place in Santa Fe and walk around. There are native vendors with much for sale on one side of the street and us white folks selling stuff on the other side. Conundrum. The shops are nice but way way expensive. Santa Fe is a quaint town which I liken to Carmel/Santa Barbara California. Cute, but no one I know could afford to live there. I take pictures and we leave for Albuquerque.

Since we are traveling on freeways Dbf can get cell phone reception. This is bad. Short story, my boys have disobeyed and entered our house at various times. Dbf is ranting and ranting and ranting. I realize that they shouldn't have, but I'm on vacation and ranting at me non-stop will not fix anything. On and on and on and on!

We find a hotel in Albuquerque around Old Town. Because of the ranting we get into Old Town as it is closing. It looked interesting and I would love to visit again.

Friday night was tense, but quiet.

Saturday, our last full day. We leave for Phoenix. The drive (I'm driving this day because, honestly I do it much better) is spectacular to me. I like the terrain, the mesas, the hills in the horizon. We leave the highway and travel though the Apache reservation which is very forested. We don't find any vendors until we leave, at the south entrance. I purchased 3 necklaces for $15. They are very nice. The drive from the end of the reservation to Phoenix is very curvy and mountainy. The road has switchbacks. As the sun begins to set we get some amazing pictures of cactus, mesas, sky. It's beautiful.

Sunday we wake early to go to the "park and swap" he wanted to visit on our first day. There are many vendors but none with the type of items (decorations) I'm interested in.

We go to the airport, fly home.

It's over. It's too short, too stressful with ranting. It was, also, quite fun and very beautiful. I would like to do Santa Fe - Albuquerque - Phoenix again.

And from the "Instructions for Life" which hangs on my bullentin board by my desk:

10. Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer! and
15. Be gentle with the earth!

Day before, 1st day - It's a long story!

2006-05-31T13:39:00.000-04:00

The night before we left I told my sons to come up so I could let my youngest (the one working here now) use my truck while I was away. Why did I want to let him use my car, some of you might ask (my aunt and Dbf were perplexed as to why). Because I wanted to, because I wanted to make sure he could get to work, in case older son didn't come home with the other car, in case the other car broke down, because that's what mothers do. I don't know - just shut up about the truck - geeze.

We left for the airport the designated 2 hours ahead. When we arrived the $5/day lot was closed for repairs and we parked in the $6/day lot. We parked way way in the back. We were lucky to get a parking place. I got out of the car, got my luggage out of the trunk.

*side note* My Dbf is a fiddler. Do you know what a fiddler is? It is a person who, when we go anywhere, takes forever to get out of the car. I could be in the resturant and order before he gets out of the car. We had just got into the car with our packed luggage. What the hell was he doing in there?
*end side note*

Rolling the luggage behind us we go to the American desk. The airline industry decided a while ago to install terminals for self-check in. I believe they thought this would cut down long lines. Here's the reality: there is about 3 sq ft around each terminal for you to settle your luggage, dig into your purse for a credit card, scan the credit card and answer questions that you have no idea what the answer is. My choices were: Welcome Lasann. Do you want to retrieve your reservation by flight number, destination or some other method. I selected some other method because I wasn't sure if the destination was the final destination or the transfer location. It asked for the flight #. If I'd had the flight number I'd have entered it on the first screen. *And if they knew I was Lasann why don't they know where I'm flying - boggle* Another person wants to use the terminal next to me but mine and Dbf's luggage take up too much room. I fumble with the terminal and finally in a huff make a smart-ass remark. The kind lady behind the desk (who could have saved us all the hastle) volunteered to sign us in. Trying to navigage the luggage within the 3 sq ft caused me to run over my toe - damm it. The kind lady informs us that the flight is delayed an hour and we might not make our connection in Dallas. She books us on a later flight as a precaution. Bags checked we go outside to inhale 2 cigarettes in hope that the resulting nicotine rush will last the next 6 hours. Going through security is a snap. We wait, we board the flight, and off we go.

We arrrive in Dallas in record speed and make the earlier connection. I explain this double booking to the attendent in Dallas. All is well. We board (without a smoke break) and arrive safety in Phoenix. Woo Hoo - I'm finally in Phoenix.

Rental car rented, luggage loaded, off we go to find my Aunt's house. We, of course, get lost trying to get there. First off, I'd left the instructions on my desk at work. I call her and can't totally understand her but think I heard enough to get there. She says they are going to bed as they retire early. They will get up to let us in. I have to call again because we have now arrived in the desert in the middle of the night having traveled outside of Phoenix. After this and one more call we arrive.

My aunt is 74ist and her Dbf is 84. He is a polite British chap. I adore British accents and could listen to him talk for hours but I'm exhausted. We go to our room with warning that they get up bright and early. It's 2:30 a.m.

Next morning we wake early - 8:00 a.m. to the smell of coffee brewing. How can something that tastes so vile smell so good? After having enchilladas for breakfast (dear British chap couldn't stomach this breakfast and had gone home) we left for a trip to a Ross - dress for less store. My Dbf visits every Ross, Marshall's and/or TJMaxx we see. While in the store my bestest Candi calls.

*side note* I never insist that my friends do anything. However, since I'm frantic about this operation 6/12 I had insisted that she come down before surgery. *

She calls and informs me that she had planned to come down the 10th and stay for a week after surgery, BUT . . . . the transmission went out on her car. She has no money to fix it. Also, her husband (they're estranged) is losing his shop (auto body). She is lilving in his house and he has been living at the shop. So not only does she not have a car she fears being homeless. Shit - Damn - MFucker - WTF. We talk and I finally say I'll call her later. Shit - Damn.

We leave the store to go to a "park and swap" that Dbf wanted to go to. My phone rings. It is my son.

Mom,

Yes,

I have bad news

What *shaking*?

It wasn't my fault but I got into a wreck with your truck.

What happened?

I was sitting at a stop light and suddenly this girl hits the back of me at 45 MPH and pushes me into the car in front of me and the car in front of me into the car in front of her.

Are you okay? *Dbf is frowning*

Yes but the car is pretty fucked up.

Did you have your seat belt on?

No, it knocked me into the steering wheel and scrapped my shins and my neck hurts a little.

Can it be driven?

Yes, but it's pretty fucked up.

Are you sure you're ok? *Dbf is frowning and shaking head*

Etc.

Conversation ends. DBF starts rant about leaving the car with him, my aunt wants to know why I left it - STOP

Is this about them? I just heard that my bestest was having some major problems and MY - yes MY truck - is smashed and they (especially DBF) think this is a good time to harrass me - N O T!!!

Anyway, we go to the park and swap. This "park and swap" was rather high class, it being in the NE suburbs and all. We walked around (I believe it was 104 Saturday) and I find all kinds of things I want - jewelry, SW decorations. I limit myself to one ring because this is only the first day. We leave there, go to aunt's, go swimming in her pool, go to dinner with aunt and British guy, go to sleep.

IT'S SUNDAY!

I've been on vacation 36 hours and I feel like shit!!!! Two bad news calls and ranting from Dbf. I want to know where the largest hole is that I can crawl into - P L E A S E.

Sunday was a good day but you have to wait until tommorow so I can share the good stuff!!!

I'm baaaacccckk and MeMe

2006-05-30T14:55:00.000-04:00

I'm back. The trip was fantastic. The happenings at home - not so much. More about all that later. I've read the blogs (they are in alpha order in my favorites) from Arkie to Is it Blond(e). Yes, sometimes by name sometimes by site. I will catch up more tomorrow, or tonight.

Until then . .

ME ME ME

A is for Age - 54
B is for Booze - Scotch and water or a Miller Lite
C is for Career - Accounting
D is for Dad’s name - Charles Cecil (he went by Cecil)
E is for Essential Item to bring to a Party - Booze
F is for Favorite Songs at the Moment - Steve Perry - Journey - anything
G is for Goof off thing to do - Blogging, OT
H is for Hometown - Portsmouth
I is for Instrument you play - Clarinet in Jr Hi.
J is for Jam or Jelly you like - Apple
K is for Kids - Two boys - 18 and 21
L is for Living arrangement - my house empty - his house.
M is for Mom’s name - Virginia Louise - Jenny
N is for Names of best friends - Candi and Darcy
O is for overnight hospital stays - 2 births, brain surgery, broken hip, heart attack, a suspected HA - 6
P is for Phobias - actually I'm afraid of horses
Q is for Quote you like - Seek first to understand - then to be understood.
R is for Relationship that lasted longest - of course my kids - opps, no my bestest Candi for 38 years. Partner relationship - x for on and off 22 yrs
S is for Siblings - one older sister and one youngest sister, two younger brothers - one deceased.
T is for Texas, Ever been? - Yes San Antonio, Austin, Harlingen, and Corpus Christi.
U is for Unique trait - goodness - I can turn my tongue upside down?
V if for Vegetable you love - Corn on the cob is my fav
W is for Worst traits - sarcasm
X - is for XRays you’ve had - numerous with chest x-ray today
Y is for Yummy food you make - my lasagna is good, my italian meatballs are great, and my huge shredded beef enchiladas are excellent.
Z is for Zodiac sign - Sagi - half woman half horse (see P)

Pics and drama asap!

Bye bye and Meme

2006-05-18T12:07:00.000-04:00

I off the the majestic SW tomorrow. I'm sure I'll be checking in and reading the blogs.

I'm verrrrrry happy that BJ/Tyler won TAR. I feel like I did when Clinton won the whitehouse. Finally someone I'm rooting for wins!!!!

MeMe

Swiped from SS's blog cause:

I AM: confused
I WANT: to be able to walk distances again (stolen from SS)
I WISH: I could live in California
I HATE: bigots
I MISS: my kids being young
I FEAR: dying young
I HEAR: the voices of hungry people
I WONDER: where I would be, had I made different choices (stolen from SS)
I REGRET: not much
I AM NOT: completely happy
I DANCE: like a white girl
I SING: only when alone
I CRY: when people I love are mean
I AM NOT ALWAYS: satisfied
I MAKE WITH MY HANDS: amateur paintings
I WRITE: when I’m hurt
I CONFUSE: contentment with happiness.

Pyschodelic Wall

2006-05-16T19:24:00.000-04:00

That's what Dbf calls is. One son called it a tripping wall (?). The other just laughed hysterically.

Monday quickie

2006-05-15T10:44:00.000-04:00

This is a great day. It's a 7 out of 10. Why, you ask.

My son started work here today. That is so strange that my baby is working in the same building. It's so hard not to run around (well I did just get back from trying to find him) and protect him. Wow, 18 years old. He's hard to miss with his 6'4" ness. I have my fingers crossed that he takes the job serious and can make it here EVERY day during the probationary period.

Yesterday I spent the day doing what I like to do. Let's all say it together - painting walls. I painted the family room last year but the one wall was pretty banged up. I came up this this painting idea - all on my own. You see, you take masking tape and put it in random lines on the wall. Then you paint each section with a different contrasting, or sometimes complimentary shades of paint. I have, I think 7 more sections to paint. Then I'll post a picture before the pictures and southwest decor go up. It's such a novel idea. I think I'll publish a painting book. I bet no one here has seen such a wall - *giggle*.

I'm leaving on a jet plane, don't know when I'll be back again. Leav - ing on a jet plane!

Friday I'm flying the Phoenix. Two nights with my aunt and then to Durango, Colorado to stay 7 nights. Wow!

So I'm off to tidy up my desk and sneak around the factory to make sure my boy hasn't pissed anyone off yet - kidding, I think!

Miscellaneous Sunday

2006-05-07T19:07:00.000-04:00

A picture of my shoes in the closet. This isn't all of them, but 99%. I count 31 boxes/pairs that show.

I'm thinking of Tara and Steve again. I thought about them 7 or 8 times yesterday. It made me smile all day.

I went to my house that I'm trying to sell and cleaned up the back yard yesterday. I was there from 9 a.m. until 5 p.m. Lots of weeds, trash/leaves/branches to pick up. She had used some slate pieces to make a walkway. They had broken up into pieces. She also had a pool and left the bare soil. My yard slants down so they had leveled the ground and left a drop-off. I love being outside and I do like gardening and physical work but I'm not in shape for this long of a haul. When I got home last night I immediately showered. When I sat down every inch of my body ached - my fingers, especially my thumbs; my forarms; my shoulders; my back etc.; even my toes. I'm living on Aleve today.

I'm in panic mode because I only have two more weekends to do all the stuff I need to do before surgery. The other two will be spent in CO, AZ, NM. That's a good thing but I have way too much to do here. I figure I'll be incapable of anything other than the slightest activity for 4 weeks. The first weeks I will be on some good drugs!

Dateline is doing a segment on Tom Cruise tonight. I can't help but watch. Then I've become hooked on the West Wing because of Jimmy Smits; then Desperate Housewives, then Grey's Anatomy. This is my TV night.

While working in the yard yesterday I remembered a dream that I had about Carey a month ago. I was at my house and my neighbor was outside. This neighbor and I were fairly close for 4 years or more. Then she became quite hostile. That it itself is a long story. Anyway, she had another girl with her. This girl proceded to tell me that she was from SF. After talking for sometime I realized it was CAREY. Well the neighbor didn't like that I knew her (she never handled anyone having a friend other than her). She started yaking to Carey not to talk to me etc. I kept trying to tell Carey that my neighbor is crazy batty. But they had been friends (in my dream) since HS and Carey was like, *shrug* I can't help it right now but we'll talk in the box later. That crazy neighbor. I was pissed.

I'm going to try to work hard this week to make sure everything is ok at work before my vacation. And I need to get my personal stuff caught up and organized. I'll be hit and miss for a couple days.

Oh here comes Tom on TV. Later

The Muppets

2006-05-05T10:44:00.000-04:00

You Are Scooter

Brainy and knowledgable, you are the perfect sidekick.

You're always willing to lend a helping hand.

In any big event or party, you're the one who keeps things going.

"15 seconds to showtime!"

The Muppet Personality Test

The New Singer of the America's - Part Two

2006-05-04T10:38:00.000-04:00

Ok, the name of my show has been changed to include the Canucks. It is now “The New Singer of the Americas". I considered North America, but didn’t want to cause a day of protest with our neighbors to the South.

And, I’ve decided to highlight the two CDs that I need help with. The first is titled – The Girls. I thought about all the female singers I like and attempted to find a good song from each. If you have any ideas on others to be included, please let me know.

Pick one to sing:

Say a Little Prayer – Dionne Warwick
Ain’t No Mountain High Enough – Supremes
If I Could Turn Back Time – Cher
Do You Believe in Love – Cher
Natural Woman – Aretha Franklin
Killing Me Softly – Roberta Flack
The First Time Ever – Roberta Flack
You Belong to Me – Carly Simon
You’ve Got a Friend – Carly Simon
High and Higher – Rita Coolidge
All Is Fair in Love – Barbra Streisand
The Rose – Bette Middler
The Way He Makes Me Feel - Barbra
Midnight Train to Georgia – Gladys Knight
What’s Love Got to Do With It – Tina Turner

And I found a nice duet when doing this CD

Missing You – with Brandy, Dionne and Gladys

Next is called Duets. I do not like this CD much. I really need help here. I did find some unusual duets that I wasn’t aware were made. For instance, Frank Sinatra and Arthea singing What Now My Love and Tina Turner and David Bowie singing Tonight.

Pick one to sing and who would you like to sing it with? I’m wondering if Glowie will pick Bucky or Chris?

Gladys, Dionne and Elton John – That’s What Friends Are For
Elton & Kiki Dee – Don’t Go Breaking My Heart – not so good now
Kenny Rogers & Sheena Easton – We’ve Got Tonight
Babyface & Mirah Carey – Everytime I Close My Eyes
Bryan Adams & Barbra – I Finally Found Someone
Dolly Parton & Kenny Rogers – Islands in the Stream
Faith Hill & Tim McGraw – Let’s Make Love
Sinatra & Arthea – What Now My Love
George Benson & Roberta Flack – You Are the Love of My Life
James Ingram & Dolly – The Day I Fall in Love
Linda Ronstadt & James Ingram – Somewhere Out There
Anita Baker & Ingram – When You Love Someone
Patty LaBelle & Michael McDonald – On My Own
Barry Gibb & Barbara – What Kind of Fool
Roberta Flack & Donny Hathaway – Where Is the Love
Diana Ross & Lionel Ritchie – Endless Love
Tina Turner & David Bowie – Tonight
Shania Twain & Bryan Adams – From This Moment

Also, remember that I’m accepting ideas for both of these themes!

Let's switch it up - Be the American Idol

2006-05-03T12:23:00.000-04:00

I just rediscovered CD's that I made when I first became aware of the ability to download music, oh about 4 years ago. I made theme CD's. Here's the game. I'm going to list my CD's and the titles/artists. You pick which song on each CD you would perform if you were on my new show called - The New American Singer.

CD #1 - Country - Then, In Between, and Now

1. Kiss An Angel Good Morning - Charlie Pride
2. Amazed - Lonestar
3. Stand by Your Man - Tammy Wynette
4. The Best Day of My Life - George Straight
5. Rocky Top - Conway Twitty
6. Mountain Music - Alabama
7. Coal Miner's Daughter - Loretta Lynn
8. Devil When Down to Georgia - Charlie Daniels
9. Here You Come Again - Dolly Parton
10. You Are On My Mind - Willie Nelson
11. Be My Baby Tonight - John Michale Montgomery
12. Your Cheating Heart - Patsy Cline
13. Don't Take the Girl - Tim McGraw
14. Ring of Fire - Johnny Cash
15. Sail Away - Oak Ridge Boys
16. Walking After Midnight - Patsy Cline
17. Love in the First Degree - Alabama
18. Jolene - Dolly Parton
19. You're Gonna Miss Me - Brooks and Dunn
20. Tomorrow Never Comes - Garth Brooks
21. Blue Eyes Crying - Willie Nelson
22. Charlie Daniels - In America

Next is soul or R&B as it is referred to these days which I titled Motown - the best:

1. Have You Seen Her - Temptations
2. La La Means I Love You - Delfonics
3. Who's That Lady - Isley Brothers
4. Let's Get it On - Marvin Gaye
5. Oh Baby - Smokey Robinson
6. Reach Out - Four Tops
7. You Are my Sunshine - Stevie Wonder
8. Dock of the Bay - Otis Redding
9. The Way You Do the Things You Do - Temps
10. Didn't I Blow Your Mind This Time - Delfonics
11. For the Love of You - Isley Brothers
12. Isn't She Lovely - Stevie Wonder
13. Oh Girl - ChiLites
14. If You Want Me to Stay - Sly and the Family Stone
15. What's Goin On - Marvin
16. Second That Emotion - Smokey
17. Dance to the Music - Sly
18. One in My Life - Stevie
19. My Girl - Temps
20. Summertime - Sly
21. I Feel Good - James Brown

Now that's all for today. I know some of you might not know these songs/singers. Just make a wild guess then.

I gotta go get my son a job here! My picks when I return.

2006-05-01T16:14:00.000-04:00

I finally decided to have my hip replacement. I was in horrible pain in DC with all the walking. I called the surgeon last Monday. It's scheduled for June 12th. Yikes.

I've not worried about surgery before, with the exception of brain surgery, but I'm worried with the heart attack last year and all. And they are going to take my leg off my body (so to speak) and put it back on. That seems creepy to me. A friend is also having knee replacement in June. While thinking about his surgery I said, "That creeps me out that they are taking your leg apart and putting it back together". That's when he pointed out to me that they are taking my whole leg off. Ouch!

Big Brother, I'm hearing, starts in July. I will be coming out of the pain/sleeping stage by then. I'm a BB fanatic. Being home I can watch the live feeds - giggle.

Other situation, not sure yet. It's a strained peace right now.

Oh, and we leave for AZ, CO, NM two short weeks from Friday. It's going to be a busy 6 weeks with the trip and the surgery! No time for any deep thinking - phew!

BTW, let me know if loading my page gets too slow because of the pictures. I guess I could delete some of them.

Happy May - the month of both of my sisters and my mother's birth.