Sob!

I don't know how to title this. I wish I had Supes writing skills to properly tell this story.

For now, a short summary. I'm too emotional to write it all down yet.

A couple of weeks ago on OT there was a discussion about suicide. I read the entire thread with my, then, views. Now it has hit close to home.

The best friend, with no warning, hung himself in our huge Maple tree early Sunday morning. I got the call around 7:15 a.m. from foster-daughter. The police and fire department woke her up banging on the door. We sped down there, I called my x who lives in the neighborhood. He went right over. We got there 25 minutes or so later. My oldest was still asleep and we didn't want to wake him yet.

The police left the boy in the tree, covered up after some time, for 3-4 hours. Investigation, but wtf? By the time we found his father they had laid him in the yard with a sheet. Then we woke up my oldest who, to understate, went biserk. We all: x, father and father's best friend, foster daughter and son, me and Dbf, youngest and oldest son and others who stopped by after hearing the news were out side until 2:00 pm.

I know there is no logical explanation. My sons and his friends know this. But I still try to solve it. They still try to solve it. We have talked about only if, only if. We all have only ifs. We know, again logically, that there is no one "only if".

This act leaves devestation everywhere. It leaves no logic. No one reason.

My x and I try to keep an eye on the boys and fD at all times. They seem to be grieving in the ways one should. But if I'm struggling this much I know they are 100xs more lost.

Just send good thoughts to his family and friends.

I'll update later after the viewing Thursday, or maybe not until next week.

Good friend who's reading this - call me when you can. I hope that all is well with your dad!